To ensure a long and blissful marriage, I gave them the best wedding gift that I felt like a pair of lesbians could ever receive. It was my absolute favorite brand of strapless strap-on dick. It looks just like this:
Now I don't expect most of you to be familiar with this little tool. But let me just say that it is absolutely fucktastic! The part that looks like a handle goes inside one person (me) while the part that looks like a penis goes inside the other person (Kelly). The "handle" curves forward to hit the g-spot of the wearer while the penis part does it's thing for the person being penetrated. After I used this, I threw out all of my old ones and I sing its praises to any lesbian who will listen. And this is why I decided to give one to Pam and Amy as a wedding gift.
Shortly after we returned, I got a lovely thank you note from Amy: