Sinnerviewer

More Gay Agenda

2012-01-29T15:40:00.000-05:00

This could have been a quote directly from me:

I'm also LOVING these signs:

What your toilet paper says about you:

2012-01-26T10:29:00.003-05:00

Thank You, Washington State Legislature!

2012-01-23T16:33:00.001-05:00

Today, it was announced that the state legislature in Washington now has enough votes to pass a marriage equality bill. This will allow the equal treatment of gay and lesbian couples by the state in how they are recognized. It will grant them ALL of the rights that heterosexual married couples now enjoy. You can read more about it by CLICKING HERE. Thank you, Washington, for doing the right thing.

Pushing My Gay Agenda (AGAIN!)

2012-01-18T13:10:00.000-05:00

I have been told recently by my ex husband that my entire identity revolves around my sexuality. Since he doesn't speak to me or know anything about my life, I can only surmise that he, like my mom, still visit this blog regularly to stalk me. I guess he or his family hasn't hacked any of my accounts lately and this is his way of checking up on me.
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Since this is my outlet for sharing my passion for equality, I can see why *only* getting me from this perspective might seem like this is all I care about. However, all of my friends who are connected with me in other ways besides lurking on the internet know that I am far more well-rounded. However, this blog is my personal outlet to share my passion for equality and fairness.
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Mike & Lynnda, if it bothers you so much, why do you keep coming back? You could have me in your life as my friend if you would stop being such bitter, angry people. Then, you would have the real me and not just be left with articles and videos about equality that I find interesting.
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Here is today's shoving my viewpoint down the throats of people who voluntarily come here:
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Militant Lesbian Bitch

2012-01-16T11:29:00.000-05:00

"I hate the militant lesbian bitch that you've become!"

That is what my own mom told me as I was coming out and going through my divorce.

One of the things that she really hated about my coming out was that I refused to feel shame about who I was. That made me "militant", I guess. The fact that I stood up for myself and made up my mind to be happy in this life really bothered her. She wanted for me to live in a closet and not to embarrass her or my children by being the family queer. My kids could have cared less but to my mom, it was a tragedy that she felt reflected on her somehow.

I have always been a passionate person and whatever I set my mind to, I do it to the best of my ability. If I want to accomplish it, I can and I will. I wanted to share with you a quote by Martin Luther King, Jr. Since it is his day today, I thought that this post would be fitting:

"Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable... Every step toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle; the tireless exertions and passionate concern of dedicated individuals." -Martin Luther King, Jr.

I am not afraid to sacrifice, suffer or struggle for the cause of equality. One day, I want to marry the woman that I love the same way that I married the man that was my best friend. I want to enjoy all the same rights with her that I had with him and the recognition that goes with it. If that makes me a "militant lesbian bitch", call me "General Dykeypants" and let's roll.

Congrats to me...

2012-01-14T18:18:00.000-05:00

This came in the mail today. It is a letter from my university letting me know that I am on the Dean's List. Yay...

Riley on Marketing

2011-12-28T17:15:00.000-05:00

Oh. My. Gosh. This is the cutest little girl...

I Share Their Joy

2011-12-19T10:46:00.000-05:00

This video made my day! I love this...
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His Tears Are Our Shame

2011-12-04T19:33:00.000-05:00

This handsome kid is but a baby. He has totally broken my heart - his tears belong to you. Every single person who has never stood up to a bully for someone else, every person who allows their kids to think that they are better than others and every preacher that perpetuates the hatred against gay people - his tears belong to you. Shame on you for allowing this to happen!

Scarlett Letter Quote

2011-11-21T14:31:00.001-05:00

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I often think back to when I had just come out and how fragile my state of mind was. I was so beaten down from years of self-loathing and trying to be straight and feeling frustrated that God would not help me to be heterosexual. When I did tell my ex, he forbade me to even have conversations with gay people. I had no support whatsoever from a fellow gay until I decided that it was unreasonable and unfair for him to deny me any support while he enjoyed the full backing of our church and friends. When they threw me out of church and announced my sin in public and asked the members of my church to only speak to me with the purpose of addressing my sin with me, I was certainly at a weak, low point.
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I am reading "The Scarlett Letter" (Hawthorne) for my American Lit class. I came across this quote which greatly ministered to my spirit because it reminded me that where Hester is is also where I am:

Strengthened by years of hard and solemn trial, she felt herself no longer so inadequate to cope with Roger Chillingworth (her ex) as on that night, abased by sin, and half maddened by the ignominy that was still new, when they had talked together in the prison-chamber. She had climbed her way, since then, to a higher point. The old man, on the other hand, had brought himself nearer to her level, or perhaps below it, by the revenge which he had stooped for.

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Trials have a way of growing you as a person. The things that you could not bear to even think about, let alone actually live through, are easier than you think they will be. The dread that I had in the simple thought of losing this man's friendship haunted me for years and kept me from living a life that would make me happy. Now, I can see that my life has gone higher and further than I ever dreamed possible. I can also see how suffering through those trials has made me a stronger person and able to stand up under it. Those who felt that they had strength in numbers and behaved despotically towards me will have to bear their own shame for their deeds that took them below any level that I was ever on.

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Towanda, Hester Prynne!

Ads We'll Never See Again

2011-11-09T18:45:00.001-05:00

I have a funny friend, Trey,who always sends me the best e-mails. He recently sent a collection of hilarious old ads. I thought that I would share them with you. Please enjoy:

Apparently, people back in the day called fat kids "chubbies."

This is MY kinda cruise...

Obviously created by a male marketing guru...

Happy Birthday Jesus! I'll celebrate by buying myself a nice gun!

Yep. That's what wives are for!

Dear Santa, leave this under my tree and your dead!

Oh, I suddenly have a toothache...

A handy list for the busy wife who has no time (between the cooking, vacuuming and window cleaning) to make her own wish list of appliances that she would like to be gifted with:

If they could only see what is on TV for the kids today...

Okay, this ad seems legit.

Yes- ANYWHERE!

It's true. When my wife is working hard around the house, she is super cute!

I want to scream here...

I bet it's Marlboro's now.

I agree! Have a fag today!

Why are we no longer able to buy tape worms to keep us thin? This sounds like a sound diet plan!

Roles

2011-11-04T21:12:00.000-04:00

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Where I work in a computer lab at my school, a woman who found out that I was gay initiated some hetero-lesbian talk with me. This is a strange phenomenon that occurs whenever you aren't "Richard Simmons-obviously gay" and another woman finds out that you are a lesbian. They establish that they are "friendly" by telling you that they have a gay friend, uncle or neighbor. Then, there is some small talk followed by the transitional statement of "Can I ask you a personal question?" I really like this because it is hetero speak for "Can we talk about sex?

Absolutely! My favorite topic.

Usually, she wants to know what role I play. The question can be phrased in a number of different ways such as "Who's the man in your relationship?" or "Who is the dude?" or, one of my favorites, "Who takes out the trash?" This one is fun because I play a little and say, "Oh, there is no man." or "I have my daughter take out the trash." Then, I let them know that I am a Lara Croft soft butch and then they feel completely free to say anything that happens across their minds to me.

This particular woman wanted to tell me that she has always been attracted to women and she feels repulsed by men in general. All of her male relationships have been poor and none of them have lasted. She said that she has had relationships with women that could have easily been physical but there was this *one* little thing that she just couldn't get past: the idea that she would have to perform oral sex on a woman.
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Wow. You suffer through your entire life with men, knowing that you are more attracted to women, but you let a little thing like that keep you from enjoying a happy, fulfilling relationship with someone that you love? My heart went out to her!
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We are so conditioned to think in terms of roles that we have a hard time thinking outside of the box. I told this woman that there will be many, many women who don't even want oral sex. She seemed genuinely shocked -as if oral sex is all lesbians have to look forward to. I know that we will have more opportunities to talk but it really opened my eyes to how little people give consideration to what they do have control over. What is keeping YOU from getting what you want?

Meet Stayce

2011-11-02T21:13:00.000-04:00

This is me with my pal Stayce. I want you to meet her because we're going to be talking about her later this month. You should know that she rocks.

Texts from Lindsey

2011-10-31T14:50:00.002-04:00

Yeah, she has her own little pic now. I spent a cajillion dollars on her senior pics so I am getting my money's worth from it, I can assure you. Time to empty out the texts and tweets in my phone. Here they are for your reading enjoyment:

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Her dad pays big bucks to send her to a good Christian charter school where she goes for instruction 2 days per week and does the remainder of her work at home.  Today was an instruction day and I got his little gem this morning:
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"My Bible teacher told us to have a 'threesome.'  She was talking about Bible study groups.  She didn't get why we were giggling.  Poor teacher."
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(Poor, indeed!)

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Nothing is as sad as a sick kid.  Lindsey got sick over the weekend and was texting me to come get her from her dads house to come rescue her and bring her home:
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"You can't see my face right now.  It is utterly pathetic and woeful.  Plus, I am super-sick and, therefore, should be babied to no end."
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I asked her "Are you running a fever?" to which she replied:
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"You don't have to be running a fever to start an outbreak.  Ask any epidemiologist."

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I don't even know what went down here but it did make me giggle:
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"Dear Dad, YEAH. NOW YOU KNOW NOT TO STALK ME DON'T YOU?"
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Awkwardly, Miss & I went to our favorite Mexican restaurant this past Saturday. Neither of us had kids which is a miracle! Well, not so much for me since I only have a 17 year old at home now but that's beside the point. We had 2 fantastic (re: STRONG) frozen Margaritas. Towards the end of our meal, who should be seated behind us but my ex husband, his girlfriend and our 2 children. Of course the first thing I hear his his LOUD voice asking the waiter to turn the station to show the Alabama game. There goes my appetite! Before Lindsey saw me sitting behind her, she tweeted:
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"Mexican food and football...it's like my own personal purgatory."
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When I reached between the slats of the seat to pinch her tushie, she turned around and realized it was me. Then, I got this text:
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"Stop touching me. I almost screamed RAPE and socked you in the head."
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That (plus the margarita).. (mostly the margarita) made me giggle.
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My kids know that I hate talking about the cold, being cold or looking at things that look cold. So they love to torture me and Lindsey took the opportunity to do so on Friday night when it was cold and she was going to a football game with her brother. Here is that text:
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"Your son is wearing short sleeves. He wants you to know that he is bringing a jacket. I'm pretty sure it's getting left in the car."
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A few weeks ago, Lindsey went with me to visit her brother in college. As we had lunch together, I was talking about when they would get married one day and then left to go get our drinks. When I came back, they were engrossed in wedding conversation. "How mature of them to be having this adult conversation about weddings" I thought. Then, my phone beeped and I saw that Lindsey had tweeted:
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"Discussing with my brother how to organize the best Minecraft-themed wedding. We are hereby cooler than you."
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followed by:
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"We should never be allowed to be adults!"
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Finally, a text from her while she was in school:
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"We're doing radicals withing radicals now! WHAT THE CRAP! THIS IS LIKE MATH INCEPTION -.-"

Good news!

2011-10-28T21:33:00.000-04:00

2011-10-24T17:16:00.002-04:00

Just sayin'...

2011-10-19T13:56:00.000-04:00

Love Thy Neighbor

2011-10-17T17:48:00.001-04:00

What a MARVELOUS shirt! They can be ordered by clicking HERE.

2011 National Coming Out Day

2011-10-11T18:41:00.001-04:00

I came out nearly 4 years ago. I knew that I was attracted to women all of my life. I remember having a crush on a friend of my mom's. I picked flowers for her and left them on her doorstep, rand the doorbell and ran away. When she didn't see them, I rearranged them, rang the doorbell and ran again. Soon, I heard my mom calling and told me that the woman had seen me ring her doorbell and run away. Not only was I embarrassed that I got caught, but she never got my flowers.

Growing up, I heard gay jokes in my home and heard about gay people in the lives of my family members. Most of it was negative. Some was positive but there were always jokes about them. When I was 11 and we moved next door to some lesbians, I heard my mom refer to them as "the lesbians" instead of "our neighbors". I asked, "How do you know that they are lesbians?" and she replied, "You can just tell." This put the fear of God into me because I couldn't tell and what if my gayness was as plain to everyone else as the nose on my face? So I started to show an interest in boys (which I did not have). This was the first time that I remember faking my sexuality.

The more I was around to observe how gay people were treated, the more I realized that I did not want to have a part in that. I also heard that Jesus could cure me of my sin of being attracted to women. I was strongly drawn to the idea that there was a cure. I just continued to behave as a heterosexual to keep up appearances until Jesus would make me a man-lovin' girl.

No matter what I tried, nothing was working. I got married to someone that I really loved, had 2 kids, joined a church and became a Christian. I worked in the church library, volunteered as a hospice worker, was a foster mom, home schooled my kids and taught Bible study and Biblical parenting classes. I took 2 years of Biblical counseling training to find out what a counselor would tell me to do to fix myself. I continuously prayed and confessed sin after sin and then felt like a failure each time I looked at a woman and felt an attraction. It was just a depressing cycle of failure after failure. I was disappointed in me and I was disappointed in God's ability (or lack thereof) to change me.

After 17 years, I came to the end of myself. I was so depressed and felt lonely in a house full of people. I realized that, as a matter of routine, I was thinking about how my children would fare if I was gone. I spent time each day mentally planning my funeral and thinking about what I could do to prepare my children for a life without me. I knew I would have to end it soon because I wasn't changing and I was miserable.

I was reading the Bible one morning and I came across a passage in Psalm 139:14 where the scriptures say, "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made."

What?

Yes, God made me this way. The reason that He didn't fix me wasn't because my prayers weren't sincere enough, but because I wasn't broken. By praying to be straight, I was showing a spirit of ungratefulness in how He chose to make me and was not happy with who I was. My sin wasn't that I was gay, but that I was lying about it.

It took months for me to work up the courage because I knew that the church (cult) that I was a member of would announce my "sin" in a public worship service and then throw me out. (which they did, in addition to praying for my death) But I had fallen under conviction and decided to just own it and trust that God would walk with me. My greatest fear was that I might never hear from God again. How silly!

I called my dad and asked him to come over. He is the safest person in my life. I have never, at any time, felt judgment from my father. Only love, only pride and only my best interests come from him. I felt that if I could tell him who I was and he still loved me, I would survive anyone else who wouldn't. If he had rejected me, I don't think I would have survived the night.

I can't honestly tell you what I said because most of it was a blur. I remember telling him how I knew that he knew I wasn't happy (he had told me so months before) and I sort of beat around the bush before I came out with it. "Dad, I'm gay." The words just hung in the air and before I let him respond, I kept talking to keep his rejection from coming. I don't remember what else I said but I do remember that when he finally spoke, he was sorry that I had lived all of my adult life for other people and not for myself. He loved me and this didn't change anything and whatever I had to face, he was with me 110%.

Sweet relief. I felt so good when he left because I knew that if everyone else in my life rejected me, I knew that Dad still loved me. When he left and armed with new confidence, I called my best friend since childhood and told her my truth. It wasn't really news to her as she long-suspected that I might be gay and had seen me struggle through my marriage. I think she was relieved, too. Her only concern was that I might have lied to her about thinking that Jon Bon Jovi was attractive. I assured her that I would still do him in a heartbeat and all was right with the world again.

The shit totally hit the fan in every single aspect of my life. It was completely destroyed and I had to start all over. I lost 90% of my friends and 75% of my family. But I don't really want to focus on that because my story has a happy ending. Everything that I lost has been replaced with something better and the people who matter to me don't mind and the people who do mind don't matter to me.

Today is National Coming Out Day. I am telling my story because I would have never had to go through the self-doubt and self-loathing since childhood believing that something was really wrong with me if people had just recognized that some people are born this way and that it's fine. They are still good people, they are not perverts, do not "recruit" and should be treated equally. The more people that come out and speak their truth, the more the world will realize that we are everywhere and we are the people that you know and love.

If you get nothing else from reading this, please get that my dad and his wife, Gail, are parental heroes. They are the examples for other parents to follow. If you have children, realize that your child may be gay, even if he/she doesn't fit the traditional stereotypes. Please never let them hear you say anything derogatory about the LGBT community because you might be talking about them. Thanks for reading today...

Pics that made me smile this week

2011-10-06T10:53:00.000-04:00

I love things that make me smile. Here are some that I saw this week. The first one came from Peter Frampton's Facebook page. It totally cracked me up:

I imagined my future grandson wearing this:

This is Pride week in Atlanta. I'm a proud gay woman!

This sign will drive some fundamental evangelicals to the brink of murder. It makes me smile....

Wishing that my mom, who has no relationship with any of her 3 children, would get this:

What mom can't relate to this? (Besides me....)

Like my late, great and wonderful Grandma used to say: "Karma's a bitch and pay-back's hell." Boy do I miss her...

I Like This Guy...

2011-10-05T17:37:00.000-04:00

Texts from Lindsey

2011-10-04T19:01:00.001-04:00

Another edition of texts and tweets from my kid. She is constantly making me laugh with these. I hate to erase them from my phone but when my memory is full, it's time to delete. But not before putting them here so I can enjoy them forever. The latest:

When I borrowed the neighbor's new puppy to wake her up:

"Fluffiest, tiniest puppy in my bed today. BEST MORNING EVER!"

Spending the night with a friend:

"Robin is on the floor and we're playing JUST DANCE and watching Megamind and I still have flour in my eyelashes. BEST DAY EVER!"

After I put her on a plane to go to Drama camp, I asked her to text me when she landed safely. This is what I got:

"Arrived in DC. About to get off the plane. Didn't die."

Her dad picked her up and drive her home. Got this from that road trip:

"Just passed an exit for 'Hungry Mother State Park' which is just off "Scratch Gravel Road.' Someone save me."

A rare heart-warmer:

"Sometimes I wonder why I like living in Georgia so much. Then, the fireflies come out and I remember :-)"

Not sure what the hell this is:

"Sometimes, for the sake of your sanity, you just have to pretend that the floor is lava."

Funny:

"Harry Potter at the dollar movie theatre? So. Much. Yes."

She decided to tweet this about me:

"Talked my mom into going to see PLANET OF THE APES" by telling her it had baby monkeys. Someone needs grandkids ASAP!"

(This is true...)

She also likes to tweet things that she hears me say that crack her up:

"Who's going to eat anonymous cookies? NO ONE does that!"~Mom

"I AM NOT SENDING YOU TO COLLEGE WITH A SIPPY CUP!"~ Mom. Shopping with family is fun!

"I never heard a depressing song with a ukulele in it." ~Mom

Already making plans for Halloween:

"For Halloween this year, I am going to be a Voldemort Lady Gaga. This will be fun!"

Cute:

"Sleeping until noon on a Monday. Guess who just beat the system? Thisgirl!"

Tweets originating from PMS:

"The next person who says America is a 'Democracy' is getting a railroad spike through their eyeball. America is a REPRESENTATIVE REPUBLIC!"

"It's 5th period and I can still see my breath. I hate this school"

My economics teacher just said "exasperated" instead of "exacerbated" and I'm biting my tongue so hard, it's bleeding!

Finally, an astute observation about men:

"Dad and brother are watching 'He's just not that into you'. Waiting for them to pull out the Twilight movies and tissues."

GOP: Starting to Make a Connection?

2011-10-03T20:27:00.000-04:00

Unless you've been under a rock, you have heard about the GOP debate about 2 weeks ago where a gay soldier asked the panel of GOP debate participants if any of them would repeal the overturn of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell". Immediately, a crowd of audience members began to Boo the soldier. Not a single candidate stood up for that soldier and now, they are all receiving the bitch-slapping that they deserve. Mitt Romney and Herman Cain spoke up the next day and said that they should have said something to the people who would boo a soldier. Too little, too late.
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Michelle Bachmann, the ultimate crazy train, has called gays "barbaric" and "of Satan". The more that she slanders LGBT folks, the steeper her numbers take a nose-dive. The media is all over the booing of a gay soldiers and the GOP is starting to make the connection that they may get their dollars from bigoted fundamental evangelicals, but the money isn't going to translate into votes if they keep treating gay people like a hunted target. After all, gay people have moms, dads, brothers and sisters who LOVE them.
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My parents would never vote for someone who called me "of Satan" or "Barbaric" because they know me, love me and want for me to have a good, happy life. They want for me to be treated equally. They don't just talk the talk, they walk the walk. In fact, here is a photo of them from last year's Atlanta Pride parade:
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They look like voters, don't they? People who march in parades are not accepting. They are ADVOCATING. Listen and learn, GOP.

My Latest Interviews

2011-09-30T07:58:00.000-04:00

Been busy writing for The Georgia Voice. I had 2 interviews in the latest issue (Pride edition):

Indigo Girls: Amy Ray

Sir Ari Gold

Check 'em out.

Food for Thought & A Great Pic

2011-09-28T19:06:00.002-04:00

This is something to ponder:

A year ago, my parents went with me to Italy and we had the BEST time EVER! I just came across this pic of our first night stranded at the JFK Inn when our flight to Milan was cancelled due to bad weather. Our first night was spent sharing a room with them in the dumpiest of dumpy airport hotels. Still, we had a GREAT time. I am just crazy about my parents.

I Heart John Shore

2011-09-24T12:38:00.000-04:00

I know that I've already bragged on blogger John Shore. I wanted to pass along his passionate post about the suicide of 14 year old Jamey Rodemeyer. CLICK HERE and you won't be sorry.

Update from the University of the Stars

2011-09-21T12:56:00.002-04:00

Gosh, I know it has been a while since I last posted. I went from a crazy "College Algebra in 5 Weeks" schedule this summer to graduating with my AAS in Marketing Management to (ONLY 5 DAYS LATER) transferring to a state university to work on my BA in Professional Communications degree.

I have a few highlights to add here but no time to really write about much as I have a class in 10 minutes. Sooo, without further ado, here is what's been happening:

Sent my precious baby boy off to GA Southern to study nuclear engineering. (Sad mom)
Got a hot American Lit teacher (first hot teacher in many, many years)
Got a sweet job as a monitor in a language lab. I sit at the front of the room and do my homework and make certain that students don't steal the computers
Got some cool interviews lined up: Amy Ray from the Indigo Girls is tomorrow. Also, Sir Ari Gold and Leisha Hailey from "The 'L' Word" is on Friday.
Some vindication has taken place in my life and I have been able to enjoy Karma rap the knuckles of someone who deserved it. I don't enjoy seeing anyone suffer but it was nice to feel like what comes around DOES, in fact, go around.
Yesterday saw the end of DADT - the discriminatory military policy that treated gay and lesbian soldiers like criminals.

Here is a video that I want to leave you with. This U.S. Airman called his dad in Alabama to tell him that he is gay. What does he ask of his father? "Will you still love me?" I am crying as I type this because I know that fear. He tells his dad who then says, "Yes, I still love you son. It doesn't change our relationship. You are my son and I am very proud of you." Just like my father. I felt his relief when he knew that his dad still loved him. Please enjoy this touching story:

Reasons NOT to Stay in the Closet...

2011-08-23T19:15:00.000-04:00

Texts From Lindsey

2011-08-17T15:03:00.002-04:00

It's that tme agian. I have a phone full of texts & tweets from Lindsey, my teenage daughter. She is always making me laugh. Here are some new ones. Enjoy:

Her: I need a black semiformal dress by the 22.
Me: And?
Her: I mean do u have one that might fit me?
Me: I don't even OWN a dress!
Her: it was worth a shot...like maybe u had one that you've never worn?
Me: Have you ever MET me?
Her: Ok, ok. Point taken.

TWEET:THREE TIMES now I've been outside picking up pinecones in the front yard and not ONCE have I gotten a single honk! Back to the treadmill.

TWEET: watching an alien movie. By myself. In the dark. So terrified I'm about to pee. This is the most fun I've had all week!

TWEET: if I ever invent a time machine, the first thing I'm going to do is go back to Egypt and slap Pythagoras in the face.

TWEET: ordered fish-n-chips for dinner tonight. I don't even like fish. Must stop watching BBC.

TWEET:KFC is a place of silmutaneous fried chicken and fear of being kidnapped in the parking lot.

I'm Not Your Friend

2011-07-29T17:47:00.000-04:00

According to Bishop Ellis Mack of Chicago's New Faith Church, I am not your friend. I can never be a friend. I am not interested in your friendship because I am only after "strange flesh". He also says that animals should have rights because God made them but gays should not because He did not create us this way. See for yourself:

If You Know People That Are In Homosexuality, Those Are Not Your Friends. They Are After Strange Flesh Not Friendship from Connie Jackson on Vimeo.

I wish liars like Bishop Mack would stop making this Kool-Ade for people to drink so we wouldn't have to continuously battle the perception that we choose to be animals who not only shouldn't have rights, but should be treated with disgust and disdain.

Thinking Tats Again

2011-07-26T22:21:00.000-04:00

I'm really not one for tattoos. I like them - occasionally. Mostly, I don't like them on the leg of a pale woman. You know, the kind that is so white that you can see her 5 o'clock shadow of leg hair coming in. A tattoo just looks horrible on a leg like that. I also do not care for any ink from the visible neck upward. No face or neck tats. It's just too much of a "LOOK AT ME!" cry. Attention whores shall not have my attention.

Anyway, I keep thinking about getting one but I am the type of person that gets tired of my own freckles. I think I might love it and then, a year or two later, would be so sick of it. I also think about things through my life that might have inspired me to get a tat that I would now be embarrassed to have. That being said, there are 2 that I have always thought about getting are still in my mind as ones that I would still like. I love the saying "May the bridges that I burn light my way." I also have a deep connection to the songs "Sweet Surrender" by Sarah McLachlan and "Don't Surrender" by Joan Jett. I was thinking about a black heart background with a white, tattered rag (flag) being held up in front of it by my hand.

Back to studying for Algebra...

Makes Me Cry

2011-07-24T16:18:00.000-04:00

My deepest heartfelt congrats to Phyllis Siegel (76) and her WIFE, Connie Kopelov (83). They were the first same-sex couple to legally marry in New York City today.

"And now these 3 remain: Faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is LOVE." -1 Corinthians 13:13

I Like This Quote...

2011-07-16T14:22:00.000-04:00

It is no insult to your parents or predecessors to live into a different vision than the one they dreamed for you. But it is a terrible loss, though, for the world to never know who you might have been.

-Rev. Michael Piazza

Robin Meade, Garden Veggies and Algebra

2011-07-14T20:54:00.000-04:00

I have more tomatoes in my garden than I know what to do with. My neighbors and parents have received some of the overflow, but I can only eat so many tomato sandwiches. Here is Robin in the garden.

Robin gave me the brilliant idea to make some fresh salsa. I have LOADS of tomatoes and jalapeno peppers so we picked 2 big baskets today and will start chopping tomorrow!

ALERT THE PRESS!

I got my first Algebra quiz back today and I got a 99 - my first A in Math EVER. I don't want to jinx it but if I can keep it going, I will graduate in 4 more weeks with a perfect 4.0 GPA.

I will be studying like a crazy person for the weekend so Robin is just going to have to hang around the house and entertain herself for a few days. We'll get back to you next week :-)

Robin Meade Goes to Motley Crue

2011-07-11T18:38:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, we had our last hurrah for a few weeks. Robin Meade wanted to branch out from her country roots and do some head-banging so we got some tickets to see Motley Crue and Poison here in the ATL.

Robin was tired of being seen in the same dress all over the place so she borrowed a dress from our 12 year olds' Barbie collection and dolled herself up to look glam. Here she is with Melissa, ready to go!

Since we're poor college students, Melissa, Nick, Robin and I got lawn seats. Here is Melissa, Nick & Robin enjoying the lovely Georgia evening.

Here I am with my handsome son, Nick. When he was born, I named him Nicholas Stephen after Nikki Sixx of Motley Crue and Stephen Tyler of Aerosmith. Being named after two such cool men, he had no choice but to grow up to be as cool and he totally is.

These are are awesome friends, Michelle and Alex. They sat with us so we could all rock out together.

Robin fit right in with all of the people around us. Well, she shed her glam dress because it was a tad too uncomfortable.

Here is Michelle and Robin rockin' out.

Here is Robin enjoying the music. Both bands were really entertaining.

They had something where you could e-mail a pic of you with your smart phone at the beginning of the show. Michelle and Alex sent our pic in and it ended up on the giant screen during "Too Young to Fall in Love". Fortunately, someone put it on YouTube. Our pic comes on at 2:39.

And so it begins...

2011-07-09T14:42:00.001-04:00

Academic life has begun again. While most of the other college students are enjoying their summer off, I am back in the mix. I have not taken any time off from school (not even last summer) because I want to graduate before my school changes the requirements for graduation this fall. And by "graduate", I only mean getting my Associates and then going to the university to finish my 4 year, so I won't really be out of school... just out of this school. If I don't get out in August, there is a whole new slew of classes that I would be required to take, including MORE accounting! A slow ride down a razor blade slide and falling into a pool of rubbing alcohol would be preferable to more accounting so I am cramming my last 2 classes in this summer.

Missy & I decided that we should at least take 1 class together in college and since she's good at math, Algebra is what we ended up doing together. We researched our teacher on RateMyProfessor.com and she got the best marks. She's called "Jonsey" and I think she's a granola lesbian. She is certainly nice and can teach much better than my last 2 math teachers. She looks awkward in a dress and I am thankful that she isn't hot so as not to be a distraction for us.

Jonsey is cramming 10 weeks worth of Algebra into 5 weeks of classes so we have to go 4 days a week and are doing 2 sub chapters per day. So far, it is horrendous but Robin Meade is right here with me, cheering me on and keeping me focused. (on her). See?

When I am getting confused, she stands on my desk and makes Post-It notes to remind me about the things that she feels will help me keep it straight. Here she is, being the best gosh-darn tutor there ever was:

Today, it is all about Algebra. And so is tomorrow. But tomorrow night, Robin Meade and I are going to go see Motley Crue and Poison. After all, we need a little head-banging from time to time, right? I'll be sure to post pics when I have some time.

Lake Michigan With Robin Meade

2011-07-07T20:32:00.001-04:00

After our long Fourth of July celebration, Robin and I needed a day of rest and relaxation. The famous Michigan family took me to Lake Michigan and we spent a few hours laying in the sand and enjoying the view. Here is Robin soaking up the rays...

My drive back to Atlanta from Michigan was made PAINFUL by the state of Kentucky whose fake road projects set up 9 miles of cones to make the highway 1 lane but involved no actual work being done. It set us back 3 hours. As a matter of principal, I made it a point to wait to get to Tennessee to buy my food and gas and only got off the exit in KY to use the bathroom. Take THAT, KenSUCKY!
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Melissa and I started our new quarter of school this morning with our Algebra class and Robin has promised to help us get through this challenging summer quarter. We'll keep you all posted!

4th of July With Robin Meade

2011-07-04T23:54:00.002-04:00

Robin Meade & I started the day out in a relaxing float around the pool. We were going to a big party later and wanted to get a little sunshine. Not to worry, though. We wore sunscreen!

A total stranger brought the fattest, cutest baby to the party so I had to hog him. Here he is getting neck sugar from me. Gosh, I am longing for grand kids already.

Here is a patriotic Robin overlooking the party from the balcony. She is enjoying herself here in Michigan!

Melissa is warming up to Robin now that she isn't feeling a competition with Robin. It warmed my heart to see Melissa sharing her Bomb-Pop Popsicle with Robin. I love it when women get along! That is what this country is all about!!

I am also enjoying my family time. Here I am with my baby boy, Nick. Isn't he a handsome fella?

Melissa came over to give me a lap-dance. Okay, she didn't. She just sat in my lap and gave me some love while Nick snapped the pic.

Amy had the party at her house. Next to her pool is this wooden carving of a captain. He normally has a captain hat but he got this festive sparkle hat. Then, someone else gave him a necklace. Joy loaned him her shades and I thought he looked thirsty so I gave him a beer. He ended up looking like he had a makeover and before you know it, chicks like Robin Meade were ALL over him. Lucky old man!

Nick brought some fireworks and shot them off for the kids at the party. Robin wanted a good view so she is atop Amy's hat.

Michigan can actually get cold in the summer so we had a bonfire after dark. Here is Robin warming up and getting ready to swap stories with other guests.

(She really looks HOT here)

I didn't see Robin drink the whole day or night but she did bring this beer bottle to me to get recycled. In Michigan, you get .10 per can or bottle when you return it. Thanks for going green, Robin. You are always setting a great example for those around you!

Tomorrow, Robin and I are going to Lake Michigan and spend the day at the beach. Ciao!

My Summer With Robin Meade: Michigan

2011-07-02T23:39:00.002-04:00

A few posts ago, I let my reader(s?) know that I got a special new gift of a mini Robin Meade standee/bookmark/something or another and that we were going to have a summer adventure together. I wanted to make our summer together special so I decided to take Robin with me to visit family in Michigan. Here is Robin helping me pack my suitcase...

As I type this, just before going to bed, I am looking forward to our big Independence Day celebration tomorrow. I will be sure to take plenty of pics and post them here so that everyone can keep up with what Robin is doing. Ciao!

Tweets from Lindsey

2011-06-30T06:29:00.002-04:00

Same situation. I get Tweets from my 17 year old daughter. They are sent to my phone and my inbox is full of her cute Tweets so I am dropping them off here so that I can delete them from my inbox and have room for new messages. Without further ado:

Tweet 1:
How I judge someone in the parking lot is going to murder me: if he wears socks with sandals or leaves a dress shirt untucked.

Tweet 2:
Convinced I saw a lamp floating outside. Forgot about a little thing called reflections. I'm an idiot...

Tweet 3: (She tweeted this conversation between Melissa & I about her home state of Michigan)
M: "The beach is awesome, too."
S: "When we went last July, we were wearing hoodies. It was freezing!"
M: "THAT WAS AN UNSEASONABLY COLD SUMMER!"

Tweet 4:
5 Facts About My Mom:
1. She looks like me only not
2. She can kick your moms butt
3. She'll get yo respect even if she has to hold your cat hostage
4. She likes Joan Jett and knows every decent 80s song
5. Well, let's just say that she managed to deal with ME. The end.

Tweet 5:
Cheetos inside of Bugles are not nearly as delicious as they sound.

Tweet 6:
Just passed a kid mowing his grass shirtless, so white I thought he was wearing a t-shirt. KID, THAT IS NOT A SKIN TONE. THAT IS MAYONNAISE.

Tweet 7:
Made some kid trip when I bent over to pick up my phone. CONFIDENCE BOOST.

Tweet 8:
I now have a flash drive shaped like a Beluga on a lanyard. Feel free to be jealous.

Tweet 9:
A fly just landed on my monitor. I tried to shoo it away with the cursor. Blonde moment in a brunette's life...

Tweet 10: (Conversation with her friend)
"I don't know if we can do it this Friday. My uncle lives in my basement."
"OH MY GOSH SO DOES MINE!" *Tara and I high-five each other.*

Tweet 11:
June in Georgia and my mom is huddled under a snowman-and-penguin patterned blanket on the carport. Someone has serious issues with cold.

Tweet 12: (Tweeting a scenario between her and Melissa)
Melissa: "THERE'S A WASP!"
Me: "That's a lightning bug."
*bug flashes*
Melissa: "...oh."

Tweet 13:
"Are we putting zombie stickers on the back of the car or not?" ~ Mom

Tweet 14: (A conversation between me and Melissa)
Melissa: "You can't go wrong with a mandolin!!"
Mom: "....Yeah. Yeah, you can."

Tweet 15: (From last night)
Heading to the store with Mom to pick up milk in order to make blueberry cobbler at midnight. WE ARE THAT COOL.
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Yes, kid. We are.
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Making this gay: I was HORRIFIED when I read about an Arkansas newspaper, The Batesville Daily Guard, that omitted a partner's name from an obituary. Initially, they were going to offer an apology to the partner. Instead, they took out a full page ad to ridicule the partner of the deceased man and stand firm in their discriminatory policy. If you are as disgusted as I am about this, CLICK HERE to read about it and sign the petition to ask the paper to change their policy.

Spending the Summer With Robin Meade

2011-06-29T06:28:00.000-04:00

People who know me know that I enjoy starting my mornings watching "Morning Express With Robin Meade" on HLN. She's a funny, interesting, attractive, sexy, cool news hottie and I love that my wife lets me have my tea and oatmeal with Robin each morning. In fact, I wanted to have Robin as my "freebie" but Melissa said "No" since we live in the same city. ANYWAY - the other day, my friend Mary Helen gave me a little treat: a Robin Meade laminated bookmark:

Suddenly, I've become rather attached to Robin and thinking how much fun Robin & I would have if we spent the rest of the summer together. Therefore, I plan to do just that. I'm calling it "My Summer With Robin Meade" and I will post our adventures right here on this blog. I won't promise anything on a daily basis because I will be eyeballs-deep in Algebra class this summer. But I can assure you that Robin and I will enjoy some good times together. We are having our grand kick-off tomorrow night when we drive to Michigan together to visit my wife's family. Please stay tuned to this blog to keep up to date on what Robin & I are doing! (and, YES, that was a gay post!)

My Lezzie Friends

2011-06-28T08:17:00.001-04:00

I was telling you about my awesome pals. Here they are from L to R: Alex, Belinda, Mary Helen, Melissa, Karri and Michelle. These grrls are the BEST gay pals a woman could ask for!

The Homosexuals

2011-06-27T16:52:00.000-04:00

The 27th day of Gay Pride month! WooHoo!

Last night, I went to dinner with my lesbian BFFs. We had sushi and went to the loft of one of them to eat dessert, drink wine and have fun. We always laugh and have the best time and I truly love those girls. One of them showed us a short video from 1967 that aired on CBS. It was hosted by Mike Wallace and if you like this short version, there is a longer version HERE. Enjoy:

Lesbian Academics

2011-06-26T07:20:00.001-04:00

I just got my latest report card. It had 3 more A's on it helping maintain my 4.0 GPA. I bust my hiney to get excellent grades. First of all, I like a free education, which is what mine is because my grades are so good. Secondly, I like scholarships. In fact, I have won 3 this year. None of them have been much, but if people want to give me money here and there because I am a good student, that is certainly not a problem for me. Thirdly, I want to make sure that all of my professors and classmates know that the best student there is gay. I really feel an obligation to represent the LGBT community in the most positive light possible. I never start off announcing that I am gay, but I usually try to work it in after everyone has already fallen in love with me and it works like a charm. Even the cranky fundamental evangelicals, after we talk Jesus for a few weeks, seem to be able to adjust to learning that their sister in Christ is also a "sister". Most important of all, though, the reason I try so very hard in school is because I want to set a good example for my children. If their mom, who sometimes cannot remember why she is standing in the hallway, can get straight A's, there is simply no good excuse why they with their healthy, fresh minds and solid homeschooled background, cannot do the same.

Texts from Lindsey

2011-06-25T16:54:00.001-04:00

Yes, it's that time again. My inbox from my text messages is getting full - mostly saved texts that my 17 year old daughter sent to me via text or Twitter. I have to clear them out to free up some space so I put them here from time to time just to not lose track of them. Here they are - enjoy!

1. This series cracked me up:

"omg. I. hate. kids. so. much."

I ask why. She replies:

"Damn neighbor kids. Threw a football against the window and woke up the baby. (our dog, Jack) I almost went out there and shot both of 'em right then!"

(you can almost picture her growing up to be the old lady on the street that keeps kids balls that land in her yard, can't you?)

2. This random question:

"Was I annoying when I could walk and talk simultaneously?"

3. Another random one:

"Kitten people are sort of okay. Just not cat people."

4. We had 3 sick people in the house when she was at her dads. When it was time for her to come over, she sent this text:

"Should I be packing or is there too much diseasyness?"

5. I sent a text: "Who wants to kiss me?" to which she replied:

"I do! *bounces up and down* Pick me!!!" - how adorable.

6. My daughter abhors loud places and loud people - I think she has a touch of Autism. Yet each time my mom comes in town, she wants to take all of the grandkids to the bowling ally. The last time she dragged poor Lindsey there, I got this text:

"I HATE BOWLING ALLYS SO MUCH."

to which I replied, "Just try to enjoy yourself." She responded:

"How???? I don't want to stay with these people for SO MANY HOURS."

To encourage her, I just agreed: "Sucks to be you" to which she replied:

"Yes it does... so I'm stuck. And then we have to go to DINNER and then a freaking MOVIE. SO MANY HOURS OF LOUD PEOPLE!"

7. This one made me laugh:

"I WENT TO SLEEP AT 7. What the hell is wrong with me?"

8. At Christmas when my mom came to town, she wanted to take all of the grandkids out. They range in age from 19-3 so sometimes, the olders have to go where the youngers will enjoy. Lindsey sent this one to me when she had to do a stint at Chuck E. Cheese's:

"I have to go see cousins @ Chuck e. f*cking Cheese."

9. From her dad's house on Christmas Eve:

"It's a sad day when you can't distinguish the cause of a tension headache because there are SO MANY potential causes..."

I asked her if there would be people there that she didn't care for. She replied:

"YES THERE WILL BE. I now officially DETEST Christmas."

A few hours later, she sent me a text complaining about a poodle belonging to her Uncle Del, who just moved in to her dad's basement:

"GNAUGH *Bashes head against wall* There's a severely overgrown poofball wreaking havoc all throughout my house... help meeeee!"

I said, "I'm sorry, Pook." to which she replied:

"And Del keeps trying the "oh maybe Jack (her dog) did it" approach and it's not fooling anyone and I WANT THESE PEOPLE OUT OF MY FACE!"

so I told her to just go to her room and close the door. She replied:

"Dad won't let me." which was followed up with this comment:

"Sorry what was that? I couldn't hear you over the sound of SCREAMING CHILDREN and OBNOXIOUS ADULTS and BARKING ANIMALS."

(I bet you are starting to really get an idea of how much my child values peace and quiet. Her apple didn't fall far from my tree.)

10. Reading the headlines of the National Enquirer, she texted me:

"JOHN EDWARDS IS A DICK." - tell me something I didn't know.

11. She will not participate in any type of shopping event. Therefore, her clothing is left to me to buy. However, I will not participate in any shopping event, either. Thus, Melissa is in charge of buying all of the clothes for both of us. This text from Lindsey made me laugh:

"It's official: I need a bra. 36C. Go crazy."

12. The BEST text I ever got:

"Thank you for not being like any other mom in the world. I don't think I could live with anyone else :/ or anyone else could live with me..."

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Random gay thing to keep my string of Gay Pride Month gay posts going:

This cute chick and I in Italy last year.

I'm in a New York State of Mind

2011-06-25T00:03:00.000-04:00

Tonight, New York voted to become the 6th state to Read all about it vote for equality and fairness by allowing gay marriage. The tide continues to turn and I am thrilled to see that people are less and less accepting of religious zealots using their Bibles to crush the hopes and dreams of loving couples. You can read more about it by clicking HERE.

Kitty Lambert: My Gay Hero for Today

2011-06-23T18:15:00.000-04:00

I never get tired of this video:
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Gay Dads

2011-06-22T07:52:00.000-04:00

I just HATE that I can't embed the video that I want to share with you today. I saw it on CBS Sunday Morning (Father's Day) and it just warmed my heart to see these gay dads and their precious baby girl. It is 2:48 long and will leave you smiling from ear to ear. CLICK HERE to take a look.

Snapping for John Shore

2011-06-21T09:01:00.004-04:00

When I was a forum facilitator at a gay youth non-profit, we had to set the discussion rules at the beginning of each session. This was designed to help the young people learn to communicate in a healthy way without offending each other or getting into arguments. We read the "ropes" (I guess "rules" was not a very hip word to use with kids) to them at the beginning of each discussion forum to remind them and to let the newbies know how things are done.

Part of the "ropes" were that if you felt insulted by someone or they said something that hurt you, you couldn't interrupt them except to say "Ouch!" and then, when they were finished speaking, you could go back and address that. If you liked what someone was saying, you could snap your fingers as a way to quietly applaud them without drowning out what they were saying with real clapping.

I know. Pretty gay, huh?

I found myself thinking about snapping for John Shore last night. I was reading his blog and just enjoying it so much. I want to give him snaps for his humorous and insightful way of looking at sexuality from a real Christian perspective. I always find myself cheering him on, laughing and connecting with him on a spiritual level. Here is what made me laugh last night:

THIS POST started out with a letter written by a lesbian who has a heart to serve Jesus. She wrote him a long letter which could have been written by me 15 years ago. It detailed her struggles with her sexuality, fear of rejection by her Christian peers and family and the desire to love and serve alongside a woman, not a man. I implore you to read it. It was really moving and heart-wrenching. Here are the parts of John's reply that I just adored:

Oh, Lord. When is this caustic, toxic, hateful, homophobic bullshit Christians do going to stop already?

Look at this girl. Look at her love. Look at her desperate yearning to do nothing more than love and be loved.

She wants to love, be loved, and know that God doesn’t hate her. That’s it. That’s her heart’s desire. That’s what she needs. Same as any other person (of faith) in the world.

And there’s Christianity — which is supposed to be founded on the unconditional love of God — breaking and tearing apart her heart. Shredding her sense of worth. Devastating her confidence. Ruining her relationships.

Destroying her life.

And still she loves Christ. This girl is so deeply wedded to the very heart and soul of Jesus that despite two thousand years worth of ignorant and poisonous institutionalized Christianity being leveled against her and everything she knows about herself, still she clings to God, still she loves Jesus, still she seeks reconciliation between herself and the God who calls all to his side.

Phenomenal.

And there’s her poor mother reading books on how to “heal” her, and praying that God will fix her.

And her crime? The thing that makes her anathema to the faith that she champions, that she continues to love despite its condemnation of her?

She dreams of having a woman by her side instead of a man.

And then there is this gem where he replied to her and I agreed in my heart with him as well as laughed at his humor:

The moment I read her letter I answered her back this:

"It’s okay that you’re gay. God loves you no less for that. Some PEOPLE decided to translate their fear of gays into Biblical texts, but those are translation errors, not reality. And then SOME Christians decided to believe in that translation, not because they were listening to God (who invites EVERYONE to come to him/her), but because they were listening to their own craziness."

I pray she hears that.

Are you out there, girl? Hear that! God doesn’t care if you’re gay. God made you gay. God likes you being gay. God likes girls; you like girls; I like girls; everyone likes girls. It’s perfectly okay for you to be perfectly lesbian.

Damn straight, John Shore! Thank you for being a wonderful, Christian, straight ally to the gay community! I am quietly snapping for you - keep doing what you're doing and don't stop!

PMS Week: Hurrah!

2011-06-20T22:56:00.001-04:00

I sat here for a while trying to think about what to write because I woke up with a raging headache and terrible cramps. I couldn't think of what to write and then it hit me: write what you know.

I have also found this funny list of acronyms that PMS might also stand for but I would like to invite my readers to comment with their own. Here are a few to get you started:

1. Pass My Shotgun

2. Psychotic Mood Shift

3. Perpetual Munching Spree

4. Puffy Mid-Section

5. Pimples May Surface

6. Provide Me with Sweets

7. People Make me Sick

8. Pardon My Sobbing

9. Pass My Sweatpants

10. Pissy Mood Syndrome

11. Plainly; Men Suck

12. Pack My Stuff

13. Potential Murder Suspect
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Gay angle: Get the hell off my back with this "every day has to be a gay-related post" for the entire month of June!!! And pass me that chocolate on your way off my blog!

Cream Puffs

2011-06-19T14:28:00.002-04:00

When I was riding the free shuttle around Chattanooga yesterday morning and looking for a good place to eat breakfast, Melissa asked a homeless man on the bus for his recommendation. He told us about a place called "The City Cafe" diner. He also told us where to get off the bus to eat there. We did and it was DELICIOUS! I don't think I have ever blogged a recommendation for a restaurant before but I am doing so now because this time next week, I will have long since forgotten where the place was that had cream puffs TO DIE (or kill) FOR!!! This way, I am reminding myself in a clever way that makes it look like I am actually keeping up with my important blog. I know it's not very gay to talk about a diner, but talking about "cream puffs" is pretty gay so I'm counting it.

Lesbians and Boobs

2011-06-18T12:05:00.002-04:00

Insurance is killing me. As a result, I decided back in February that I would pay my March premium, get my check-ups done and drop my insurance. I had a mammogram - my first since I was 35 and had a base-line done. I wanted to get it over with and went to one of the best hospitals in the country to have it done. Imagine my surprise when they requested my baseline films to compare my new ones with. So I ordered them to be sent and waited to get my clean bill of health.

I got a few weird letters telling me that I missed an appointment and when one came last week as certified, I called the hospital to tell them that I made my appointment and was waiting for my results. Apparently, the results came back that I needed a diagnostic appointment because I have something in both of my breasts. A letter was supposedly faxed to my doctor, who never got it. If I had not followed up, who knows how long it would have taken me to make my follow-up appointment.

I feel calm about it. If I have some type of breast cancer and it's early, I will just have them take them both off and be done with it. If it is a later stage, I will fight with all my might to stick around because my dream is to see my kids have kids of their own. If it is too late and I don't have a lot of time, I am ready to go, although it would be with some sadness that I never got to meet my grandkids or see my children get married. I will feel apprehensive about who would take care of my parents and my 2 chirrens. In the end, I know they will be in God's hands.

So how can I make this post gay? Easy! I found this page from BreastCancer.org that discusses lesbians and breast cancer. It advises that women should be open about their sexuality with their healthcare providers, partner rights, estranged family members, privacy and other issues that seem to be common among lesbians. If you are a lesbian, be sure to peruse this page sometime and educate yourself before you find yourself in a crisis.

Chattanooga's Pretty Gay...

2011-06-17T22:34:00.001-04:00

A very good friend recently sent a surprise gift - some cash with a note telling me to get away and relax. Although I would have gone the day that it came, I have been too swamped with school work. Since my quarter ended on Thursday and won't resume until July 6th and the kids will be gone, this was my golden opportunity to get away. What wasn't going to be a sucky drive and where we would feel like we weren't in Atlanta anymore?

Chattanooga.

Chattanooga is only about an hour north of us. Melissa & I packed up and headed up this afternoon. Priceline let us name our own price and we are now at a lovely hotel laying in a bed that feels like a cloud. There are 2 beds in the room but we're in the same bed so that makes this post gay. In fact, here is a photo of our feet:

So there you have it: two lesbians in bed. That's pretty gay.

I know that said I was going to write a post about nasty Bill Graber and his posing as a lesbian blogger named Paula Brooks and how he/she tried to make my life a living hell but I would much rather enjoy the evening with my beautiful wife. I'll get to it some other time... he doesn't really deserve my energy, anyway. He will most certainly get his. As I type this, an entire gaggle of angry lesbians are coming down on that douche bag like a rain of brimstone in Hell. Melissa noted last night:

"He's learning the hard way that if you're going to screw lesbians, you'd better not have a dick!"

Passed That Bitch!

2011-06-16T13:44:00.004-04:00

MY MATH RE-TEST EXIT EXAM:

Everyone can relax - I passed my exit exam and am on track to graduate on time and transfer to Southern Polytechnic State University this fall. Now, on to gay things:

The crazy shit with fake "lesbian" blogger, Paula Brooks, who is really a man named Bill Graber, is all over the Internet. My friends have written their experiences with him and I plan to write mine tomorrow. You can read their stories and the hilarious comments by following these links:

Renee: http://www.lesbiatopia.com/2011/06/man-who-claimed-to-be-paula-brooks.html?spref=fb

(Best comments EVER including a demand from "Paula Brooks" to remove his photo - which was replaced with an artist rendering that doesn't nearly do justice to his actual creepy, gay man look)

Heather: http://thewishfulwriter.blogspot.com/2011/06/real-paula-brooks.html

CJ: http://fiestycharliewrites.blogspot.com/2011/06/some-thoughts-on-scandal-paula-brooks.html

That should keep you busy for a while. Prepare to BE AMAZED at the lies that this crazy person made up!

If at First You Don't Succeed, Eat Cookies.

2011-06-15T14:22:00.000-04:00

I failed my math exit exam yesterday. There were almost NO problems that I recognized and I crashed and burned. I have another try tomorrow morning and if I fail that, I am SCREWED! I can't begin to enumerate how this will negatively impact my life and I don't have time to write because I need to be studying my ass off. I am polishing off a plate of chocolate chip cookies, fending off a PMS headache and getting back to studying. But before I go, I know I promised you a month of gay posts. I thought I would show you a photo of my favorite restaurant:

Evolution of Equality

2011-06-14T12:49:00.001-04:00

I saw THIS GREAT ARTICLE about the evolution of equality in the United States. Go check it out.

Math is gay, right?

2011-06-13T23:09:00.000-04:00

I have no time to blog because I am studying for my exit exam in my math class. My test is tomorrow and if I don't pass out of this class, not only will I have to re-take it (even though I ended up with an 87 - doesn't count towards my GPA), but I won't graduate on time and may possibly lose my HOPE scholarship for good. (That would be a $12,000 loss). So how can I make this a quick gay post? Hmmm...

Well, I can tell you that I will be talking more about "Paula Brooks", the "lesbian" blogger for Lez Get Real. I have had the opportunity to experience this crazy bitch first hand and I was not surprised that the Washington Post broke the story that she is really a man using his wife's name to write under. My "guydar" was going off like crazy when I had the misfortune of writing with her at another lesbian blog. Much more to come on this story but until then, please send good vibes to me tomorrow at 1pm Eastern. Spank you.

It's Jesus Day Today: Let's Make it Gay!

2011-06-12T10:21:00.000-04:00

Gay Day 12:

Good Sunday morning to you all. I have been enjoying the morning by cooking for my son and sitting next to him while he reads and I have been preparing for my Literature/Composition final exam tomorrow morning. We have been intermittently chatting - it's his last summer at home before he goes to college in August and my time with him has become more and more precious. That's why when I read THIS ARTICLE, it made me want to cry.

It's about a young man named Ben Alley who came out to his Southern Baptist minister father and his fundamental evangelical mother at age 16. He was immediately kicked out of the family and the home and has had to support himself for the last 2 years while he finished high school and is now off to college. I would sincerely LOVE to have a conversation with these parents about the love of Christ and what that really means. My son, who is within an arms reach from me as I write this, could literally become a cannibalistic serial killer and I would love and accept him no less. I simply can't fathom how a parent can reject a child this way.
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Item #2:
This video is from Rosemarie Walston, the mother of a gay son who killed himself because of the religious rejection that he faced:

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I am heartsick for her loss and I appreciate her sharing her testimony about the damage done by the Southern Baptist Church. Shame on them!
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A ray of hope: The Association of Welcoming and Affirming Baptists. Sadly, there are only a scant few in this nation. Let's hope that this group will expand greatly.
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If I have properly riled you up against the Southern Baptist Convention, please do us all a service and GO HERE to sign a petition to ask the SBC to apologize for the harm that their religion-based bigotry has caused to GLBT people and their families. It's time for them to realize that they are, YET AGAIN, on the wrong side. In the past, they preached in favor of slavery, saying it was Biblically-sanctioned. Then, against women's rights, saying that women should never be allowed to lead. Then, against civil rights and integration. Now, against their gay sons and daughters. No wonder Jesus spent SO MUCH of his ministry teaching against religious people and the harm that they do.
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Today, LOVE the ones that you are with. Be kind to one another. Lift each other up in word and in deed. BE the change that you want to see in this world.

Marriage Equality Persuasive Speech

2011-06-11T22:04:00.000-04:00

Gay Day 11:

I had to give a persuasive speech in my Public Speaking class a few days ago. Since it was a required assignment, I chose Marriage Equality. I invited my wife to sit there and be the (sexy) face of someone who is treated as a second class citizen when it comes to marriage equality. The teacher video taped our speeches so the sound is not the greatest but when I used ear buds, I had no problem hearing the speech. It is 7 minutes and I think it ended up turning out fairly well. It was certainly well-received by my classmates. Enjoy:

Yes, we know! You think we're all going to hell. Now can we have our damn rights, please?

2011-06-10T06:49:00.004-04:00

Last night, my friend Theresa was on Facebook and her friend posted something in support of gay marriage. She sent me a note and was quite upset at the things that people had posted in reply. She sent me a copy of the quotes from the post thread including comments from the loving Christians out there who really feel duty-bound to tell us all where we are headed:

Therese: "Pastors wife...can't touch that!"

Brodie: "The author is pro lesbian, making this a pro gay marriage statement.Sign of the end of times. (Biblically speaking)"

Therese: "I know. i always get myself in trouble with these things!"

(My Friend): "welll, i for one love it!!! you know how i feel about the topic...it really saddens me that people see this sort of thing, this declaration for equality, as some sort of sinful abomination...gay people are just people...we go to work, we have families, we raise our children, we pay our taxes, we obey the law, we love just like everyone else....i don't let that sort of hatefulness get me down...love will conquer hate...'nuff said :)"

Shirley: "i agree,well said"

Brodie: "I'm not hatin' just quotin' God's word. I know we are all made in God's image."

(ME HERE: Um, no, Brodie. You didn't quote God's word. Everything that you just said was your own. And I think the Bible is very strict about saying something of your own and then trying to say it's "God's Word". Methinks you should repent before your are smited!)

My Friend: ""Love your neighbor as you love yourself." "Do not judge and you will not be judged...." that's what my Bible says...the end :)"

Phyllis: "Your right Theresa!! No one has the right to judge anyone. It is YOUR CHOICE what you do and say. But it is my job to tell you even the devil can quote a scripture in the Bible to justify something! The Lord Jesus Christ loves all and he will judge us all one day. Since your familiar with the Bible I will give you one for reference. 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 (NIV): "Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters, nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God."Take care and May God Bless and Keep You!!"

Yep, folks, it's HER JOB to let us know we're going to hell. (But have a lovely day, dear!)

Liz Feldman, I Think I'm in Love...

2011-06-09T21:06:00.000-04:00

I saw this on Facebook today and, well, I really liked it. I like the chick who made it and I think it makes a wonderful short and sweet post for GAY DAY #9!

Gay Day 8: My New Favorite Blog

2011-06-08T18:16:00.000-04:00

I have no time to really write as I am studying like a crazy person for my math finals and exit exam. I have recently come across an amazing writer, John Shore. I wanted to point you in the direction of his blog and specifically, THIS ARTICLE. It's entitled "What Would Jesus Do If Invited To A Gay Wedding" and it warmed my heart. I love his brand of Christianity - quite refreshing for someone like me who was stuck in an evangelical cult for far too long. Please go check this blog out and have a few laughs.

I Love Her...

2011-06-07T19:42:00.004-04:00

Day 7: A picture is worth a thousand words yet this one leaves me speechless:

Marriage Equality

2011-06-06T20:53:00.002-04:00

Gay Day 6:

Today, I am going into finals week and I have spent the day in the school computer lab finishing all of my math homework and writing an outline for my persuasive speech that I have to give on Friday. My topic is Marriage Equality. I thought that I would share some of my thoughts about marriage equality in the form of my outline, which needs to be pared down quite a bit but I had a lot of ideas so this is my first draft.

I am going to intro myself as a married mother of 4 (which I am). I also plan to bring my wife, Melissa, as my visual aid (she's THAT hot). I will intro her as a lesbian in my PFLAG group but not as my wife since nobody knows I'm gay in my class. At the end, I will give the big reveal that it is I that is her "partner".

By posting this here, my audience is wider and, more importantly, I can have a legitimate gay post without it eating into my dinner and watching TV time. Without further ado, I give you "Equality in Marriage":

Title: Equality in Marriage

Speaker: (Sinnerviewer), outreach coordinator for Parents, Family & Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG)

Specific Purpose: To inform my audience about inequality for gay couples and persuade them to support marriage equality.

I. Introduction

Attention-getter: This is Melissa. She is a lesbian and I wanted you to look at her and put a face with the issue of gay rights while I share with you some of the ways that she and her partner are treated as second-class citizens, along with thousands of other gay and lesbian citizens in this country. They are discriminated against based on their sexuality and our bias against them.

Establishment of ethos: You may all remember from my last speech that I am a married mother of 4 and a member of Parents, Family and Friends of Lesbians and Gays, a support group for LGBT people and their families and friends. As a patriot of this great nation, treating people as unequal is un-American and I feel it is my duty to share what I have learned about this issue so that we are all informed.

Thematic statement: Thousands of gay and lesbian couples are denied over 1400 state and federal rights that their heterosexual counterparts receive automatically with their marriage certificate.

(Transition: First, let's talk about legal protections.)

I. Legal

A. Melissa would be forced to pay estate taxes all on property inherited from her deceased partner. This means that for her to stay in the house that they bought together, she would need to buy her partner’s share by paying the government. A married person automatically inherits all the property of his or her deceased spouse without paying estate taxes.

B. Laws protect married seniors from being forced to sell their homes to pay high nursing home bills; gay seniors have no such protection.

C. Married couples have the automatic right to visit each other in the hospital and make medical decisions. Same-sex couples can be denied the right to visit a sick or injured loved one in the hospital. Melissa cannot make medical decisions for her partner unless they have hired an attorney to draw up legal documents and be able to produce them at the hospital at the time that a decision needs to be made. In addition, Melissa has no legal right to decide what will happen to her partner's remains (funeral arrangements) if she should die.

D. Other protections that are lacking for Melissa: Crime victims recovery benefits, domestic violence protection orders, judicial protections and immunity, and automatic inheritance in the absence of a will.

E. Here in Georgia and in many other states, Melissa can be fired from her job for being a lesbian. She has no legal protection from being fired based on her sexuality.

(Internal summary: As you can see, they are not “special protections” that are needed, only equal ones.)

(Transition: Now that you understand the lack of legal protections, let's talk about some of the benefits that Melissa and her partner do not have that you and your spouse might enjoy.)

II. Benefits

A. Married people receive Social Security payments upon the death of a spouse. Despite paying payroll taxes, Melissa and her wife receive no Social Security survivor benefits — resulting in an average annual income loss of $5,528 upon the death of the partner.

B. Married workers are legally entitled to unpaid leave from their jobs to care for an ill spouse. Melissa is not entitled to family leave to care for her partner should she become ill.

C. After the death of a worker, most pension plans pay survivor benefits only to a legal spouse of the participant. Melissa would be excluded from such pension benefits despite the fact that she and her partner have 4 children together.

D. Many public and private employers provide medical coverage to the spouses of their employees, but most employers (82%) do not provide coverage to the life partners of gay and lesbian employees. Gay and lesbian employees who do receive health coverage for their partners must pay federal income taxes on the value of the insurance where married couples do not.

E. Other benefits that gay couples are not entitled to: Public safety officer death benefits, spousal veterans benefits, Social Security, Medicare, joint filing of tax returns, wrongful death benefits for surviving partner and children, joint insurance plans, tax credits including: Child tax credit, Hope and lifetime learning credits, Deferred Compensation for pension and IRAs, Estate and gift tax benefits, Welfare and public assistance

(Internal summary: Clearly, the gap between heterosexual married couples and same sex couples is vast when it comes to rewarding people in committed, monogamous relationships.)

(Transition: Now that we know about the lack of legal protections and the missing benefits, I want to cover the social stigma that Melissa faces.)

III. Social

A. Married couples can hold hands in public places and people view it is a healthy expression of their love towards each other. When Melissa wants to hold the hand of her partner in public, it invites scorn, ridicule and rude comments from people.

B. Melissa and her partner face discrimination from people who think that their children would be better off being raised by heterosexual couples. However, recent studies including a long-term one that was started in 1986, show that lesbian mothers have children who do better psychologically, academically and socially. They are far less likely to be abused and they have higher rates of continuing their education beyond high school graduation.

C. Melissa and her partner would like to take their children to church to worship. However, the closest church to them that is “open and affirming” is a 45 minute drive. When Melissa’s partner revealed that she was gay at her previous church, her “sin” was announced from the pulpit and she was dis-fellowshipped in a public worship service where the church (member of the Southern Baptist Convention) prayed for her physical death.

D. “Partner” has a second-class, "less-than" status than the married terms of “husband” or “wife” have. People automatically see Melissa’s partnership as a temporary business arrangement instead of the committed, abiding love that nurtures a family.

IV. Health

A. In 2009, a pair of economists at Emory University tied the passage of state bans on same-sex marriage in the US to an increase in the rates of HIV infection. The study linked the passage of same-sex marriage ban in a state to an increase in the annual HIV rate within that state of roughly 4 cases per 100,000 population. Gay people are less healthy in general in states where there are no same-sex partner benefits.

B. Several psychological studies have shown that an increase in exposure to negative conversations and media messages about same-sex marriage creates a harmful environment for the LGBT population that may affect their health and well-being.

C. One study surveyed more than 1,500 lesbian, gay and bisexual adults across the nation and found that respondents from the 25 states that have outlawed same-sex marriage had the highest reports of "minority stress" — the chronic social stress that results from minority-group stigmatization. In fact, this past Monday, a religious-based “family” group paid $7,000 to fly a banner plane over Orlando warning the city of “Gay Day” at Disney World. These are the types of negative social messages that Melissa and her wife must fight each day to be seen as equal in the eyes of her peers.

(Internal summary: In all aspects of Melissa’s life, she has less protection, less benefits, more expenses and more social roadblocks to move past in order to live in a committed, monogamous relationship with the woman that she loves.)

(Transition: Now that you know the types of discrimination that she faces, I wanted to get you to ask yourself the following questions:)

IV. Visualization

A. Do you think that if Melissa could choose her sexuality, she would choose to have these barriers and stigma in her life as well as the lives of her children?

B. If being gay is a choice, when did you make a decision about your sexuality? Were you attracted to both men and women and then one day, opted for one side or the other? Or were you just born the way that you are? And if so, why would that be any different for Melissa?

C. Do you think that it is fair to treat fellow Americans in a clearly discriminatory way just because you do not share the same sexual orientation?

D. How do you think having Melissa be allowed to marry her partner will negatively impact heterosexual marriage? Would straight people suddenly become gay or stop having children?

E. Of the 21 nations that allow same sex marriage, what are the harmful side effects that you have observed that these countries that have suffered as a result of allowing same-sex marriage?

F. How would you like for people to vote on your marriage and benefits?

G. If marriage is a religious term, then it shouldn’t be used for anyone since our country doesn’t endorse any religion. In fact, nobody should receive a marriage license and everyone should get civil union licenses.

H. If you believe “traditional marriage” in the biblical sense is between one man and one woman, what about the numerous cases in scripture where men who were called “righteous” by God were polygamists and also had concubines (legitimate prostitutes)? Wouldn’t that be considered “traditional” marriage and if so, should we legalize and hold as ideal polygamist marriages?

I. If marriage is a “sacred institution” between one man and one woman, why don’t we pass laws banning divorce?

J. If marriage is only for couples who can physically reproduce, why don’t we ban people who can’t procreate from marrying, such as elderly and infertile couples?

K. If heterosexual marriage is the only suitable family model in which to raise children, we should ban married people with children from divorcing until their youngest child turns 18.

L. If the government will not allow same sex couples to marry and deny them the same benefits that heterosexual couples receive, shouldn’t they be exempted from paying the same rate of taxes? After all, less benefits should equal less taxes. Since they must pay the same, shouldn’t they receive the same?

M. How does making Melissa's life harder help her children, which many people consider a primary concern when it comes to same sex partnerships? If we genuinely care about the welfare of the children of gay couples, why do we make it harder and more expensive for them to operate? That is less money going towards the welfare of the children.

N. Would you prefer a gay man marry your daughter or a lesbian woman marry your son? Or should we not just allow them, as U.S. Citizens and adults, to make their own decisions about the style of their family?

O. If you have a religious objection to gay marriage, why not just avoid having a gay marriage for yourself and let other people with different beliefs do what they feel is right for them as long as they are not hurting anyone else? Their marriage should not interfere with your religion or practice thereof.

(Internal summary: These are the arguments that people wrestle with on this issue.)

(Transition: Now that you can see that none of them are really valid, you can be prepared to become a straight ally.)

V. Call to action

Summarize and review taking action: Gay people like Melissa are viewed and treated in a discriminatory manner in this country. She faces legal exposure, she lacks hundreds of benefits, she is excluded from social groups and has a social stigma attached to her sexuality and she is at risk regarding her physical and mental health.

Tie to introduction: As previously mentioned, there is a tremendous need for straight allies to speak up for marriage equality and let our legislators know how important it is to eliminate discrimination in this country and speak up for the minority group of gay and lesbian citizens like Melissa.

Creative concluding thought: Melissa is my wife. We were married in a church but nobody recognizes our commitment to each other as they would if one of us was a man. As you look at her and you look at me, please think about our lives and the lives of our children. I hope that you will never choose to stand in the way of our equality and that you will do whatever you can to help raise us and our family to the same societal stature that you and your spouse now enjoy.

My Top 5 Celeb Hotties

2011-06-05T15:20:00.003-04:00

Gay Day 5:
I mean, why the hell not? I don't care who you are. Beautiful women are fun to look at so why not spread the joy here on my blog? They are in no particular order:

Andie MacDowell: Sweet southern belle - who would not be attracted to this sexy lady from the south?

Ivanka Trump: Holy Sugar Mama! And she's pregnant now which makes her even hotter.

Angelina Jolie: I think there is a rule where you can't be a card-carrying lesbian if you don't have her on your Top 5 list. Good news: my son is hot for her, too. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

Sherilyn Fenn: Did anyone see Two Moon Junction? Aye, Carumba! That movie kept me up many a night in my younger days. Netflix it if you can.

Ashley Judd: Fate played a cruel trick on me once. I was at a record company party in Nashville and Miss Wynona Judd came over to talk to me. She started rubbing my arms and shoulders and holding my hand and telling me what positive energy I was emitting. I was flattered and enjoyed our conversation, but I was secretly crying inside because her hot sister, Ashely Judd, wasn't there to feel me up and admire my positive energy as well. Ah, well... we can't have everything, can we?

And there you have it. My top 5 hotties. For good measure, I am tossing in a 6th honorable mention: Rhianna. Her photos do not do her sexiness justice so I am posting a video that all lesbians are required to watch when they are recruited. Enjoy:

Cat's Meow

2011-06-04T21:38:00.000-04:00

Day 4 of Gay Pride Month:

I confess - this isn't really that gay. In fact, the only thing I can say that is gay about it is that I was at a gay club with my straight friend, Gina, when I shot this video of her. I was newly out of the closet and she was trying to show love and support for me by helping me to acclimate to new, gay surroundings. In reality, I never got used to gay bars but I appreciated the sentiment. She was a loving and supportive friend and straight ally. It's hard to believe we met on a Christian mission trip. But that's just how we roll!

In this clip, Gina ordered a drink special that the bartender was bragging that she hadjust invented. It was called "Cat's Meow" and it was something akin to moonshine with chocolate syrup. Of course, she didn't know that when she ordered it so here she was trying her coctail. My favorite part? At 1:31 when she said, "It don't taste good, does it?"

Illinois Becomes More Progressive

2011-06-03T11:19:00.000-04:00

Gay Day 3:

Yesterday, Illinois began to allow same sex civil unions. I know that when people read this in 50 years, they will wonder why the celebration over people being treated like a second class citizen because same sex marriage will be legal everywhere, but right now, any step in a positive direction is a success. We're just biding our time until the old, bigoted people die off and the younger, more accepting people are elected.

Yesterday, I was hanging out in the back yard with my 19 year old son who is about to go to college. He was sharing with me his progressive and grounded beliefs and I was just full of hope when he left. I know that he loves his moms and he wants for our lives to be better. I hope that someday, I can have a real wedding to my wife. My son will be my best man. Until then, I rejoice with the gays and lesbians of Illinois on your new rights. It may not be a "marriage" but it's a step in the right direction.

Day2: Even Kids Know that Homophobia is Wrong

2011-06-02T08:50:00.000-04:00

12 year old Sam Maden is my hero of the day. When his uncle unexpectedly passed away, Sam wanted to do something to honor his uncle, who was passionate about the issue of anti-gay bullying. Before his death, Sam's uncle gave Sam a necklace from The Trevor Project, an organization that provides "life-saving and life-affirming resources including (a) nationwide, 24/7 crisis intervention lifeline, digital community and advocacy/educational programs that create a safe, supportive and positive environment for everyone."

Photo: The Advocate

Sam has made an appeal to The Boston Red Sox to make an "It Gets Better" video to encourage young people who are gay to know that as bad as things might seem to them now, it does get better. Study after study shows that GLBT youth are at much higher risk for suicide than their heterosexual teen counterparts.

You can help Sam reach his goal by going HERE and signing the petition. He only needs 75 more signatures to reach his goal. Sam, thank you for doing something to help young people who are mistreated just for being who they are. You are my hero!

30 Days of Gay

2011-06-01T20:10:00.000-04:00

June is Gay Pride month. I wanted to wish all my peeps out there a happy gay pride month. Why? Because they deserve it!

I used to listen to hetero people complain about gay pride parades and celebrations. "I'm not waving a flag and marching in a parade because I am straight. Why do the gays get a special day?"

It's simple, really.

Gays deserve a day where they can be in a majority. They deserve a day where people all around them affirm them for who they are. You see, wherever hetero people go, their lives are made easier by society. They get protections from the government in their marriages. They get privlidges when it comes to adoptions and fostering. They get tax breaks and inheritance rights. They have people giving approving looks while they stroll around the park holding their sweetie's hand.

Gays... not so much.

In honor of those of us who are striving for equality and acceptance, I am striving to bring you 30 days of gay in June. It might be a joke, a photo or a good article. But for the next 30 days, you will see nothing but gay here. Enjoy!

Melissa's Errand

2011-05-26T23:02:00.003-04:00

My wife, Melissa, and I go to the same college. Although we are not legally married (our state doesn't allow it), we share the same last name. We are both 4.0 students and we are both members of the National Technical Honor Society. Last week, we were notified an advisor that our NTHS packets were in and needed to be picked up at a campus location that Melissa has classes at. She agreed to get both of ours when she had classes this past Tuesday so I sent an e-mail to the advisor letting him know that my wife would be picking mine up with hers.

That advisor had not updated his office info since his move so Melissa spent a long, long time navigating several buildings before finding him. It was quite an ordeal and she was telling me all about it when she got home. Specifically, she said, "I went through several floors of several buildings including the scariest Freddy Kruger boiler-room, pervert janitor dungeon!" The rest of the conversation went something like this:

"So I finally got to his office and he handed me my certificate and said, 'Here is yours and this one is for your husband.'"

I asked her, "Did you tell him I'm not your husband?" and she said, "No, I was so tired I didn't want to get into it. I just said, 'Thanks.' and started to leave and he said, 'Wait! Here is your tassel and this one is for your husband.' and I said, 'Thanks.' and started to leave and he said, 'Wait! Here are your honor cords for your graduation and these are for your husband.' and I said, 'Thanks.' and started to go and he said, "Wait! Here is your pin and this one is for your husband.' and I was sitting there thinking, 'Dude, just give me my husband's shit and let me go!'"

Prom Dresses Aint My Thing. Neither is Writing for Television.

2011-05-07T19:51:00.001-04:00

My internship at the TV station is coming to an end and I've discovered some things. The main most important thing is that I don't love writing stories for television the way that I do for print. It's so politically correct and full of fluff that I find it very, very difficult to really pull things together in a way that honors truth.

I also discovered that I don't like to be forced to write about things that I don't care about. For example, I had to produce a story about a prom dress non-profit. I was watching this footage of these women trying on dress after dress and talking incessantly about this princess cut or that color or shoes to go with it... OH. MY. GOD. I really can't think of anything that I hate more and yet I had to do a story about it. Torture is what it was.

The worst came when my demi-boss (not my boss - who is FREAKING AWESOME, but a supervisor in my department) said that my first draft was lacking in enthusiasm.

Yes, I don't give a shit about prom dresses. You caught me.

She said, "You know how every little girl dreams of having one perfect dance where she looks like an absolute princess?"

Excuse me but have we met? I'm the girl that you asked last week if I wanted tickets to the Flower Show and said, "I'm not really a flower show kind of girl. I really wouldn't mind some Harlem Globetrotter tickets, though." I answered her: "No. I have never wanted to go to a dance nor look like a princess. I do not relate to these women at all. I really, really want to. But I can't."

She was disappointed that we could not connect on a girly level about the prom dress issue. Then she told me about how she writes at the same level no matter if she is interested or agrees with the topic. That would have been a great way to end the conversation but she decided to go there.

She went to the library of tapes and found archived footage from the show. She had me watch a segment that she did about a lesbian couple talking about all of the rights that they do not have because they are not allowed to marry. She told me how much she disagreed with them deserving equal rights but still did the story just like all of the others. Except that instead of giving it 4-5 minutes like all of the others, she condensed this one to 1:30. Thank you for pouring salt into my lesbian wounds, intern demi-boss lady. Someday, I will share with you how I feel about my rights and we will be even.

Y=MX+B

2011-05-04T19:45:00.000-04:00

This has been my life lately. Ever since I took an internship at a local TV station, every scrap of spare time has been claimed by my wife, kids, garden and earning an income by doing odd jobs. I am starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel because my internship ends after next week. Which is why I am starting to allow myself to feel the complete and utter stress that I have been under for 6 months now. Headaches are daily, my shoulders are tense and I am always thinking about how I am going to get my homework or stories for the TV show turned in on time. Somehow I always manage but it is taking a toll.

Happy News:

My son is about to graduate from High school. He was accepted at GA Southern and got a scholarship to help out. His GPA is high enough that he qualifies for the HOPE scholarship as well so for the first year at least, he gets a free ride for his first year.
Within the last 2 months, I got 3 scholarships myself. It was nice to receive these honors/awards because it has kept me motivated to continue to give my very best effort.
My garden has been planted and my late Grandma's crowder peas are sprouting beautifully. I have many tomato plants and am excited about the future tomato sandwiches that I will be eating for lunch on a daily basis this summer.
I got hired to freelance for the boss that I was interning for. It isn't full time, but it doesn't suck!
I am also more prone to post something when I have photos. My camera has been broken for a long time but today, I got a new one. (Thanks to Trailer for the gift card - it was less than $100 out of pocket thanks to my birthday gift.)

That's it for now - I have math to do. Peace out, people.

Texts From My Peeps

2011-03-06T09:16:00.000-05:00

Yes, it's that time when my text mailbox is filling up with texts from the people in my life that I love. I usually just post the texts from my daughter Lindsey but I had some others that I needed to add here. Without further ado, here are my "LOCKED" messages- the ones I never want to let go.

FROM: Nick, my amazing son, letting me know that he just finished with his last requirement for his Eagle rank in Boy Scouts:

"Just wanted to tell you that I'm finished with my Eagle project work. Just got to get it signed by the church and its done for good."

He got it signed and got his Eagle rank. I could not be prouder.

FROM: Nick

"Night mom! Love you!"

(melt)

FROM: Nick when I started my Fall quarter. This is from the boy who helps walk me though my homework.

"Hope your classes are going well! Love you!"

FROM: Michelle, my Bon Jovi freak friend that I met in 5th grade remedial math class. I sent her a text about Bon Jovi coming to Atlanta in May. This was her reply:

"K. OMG what r u saying???"

FROM: Melissa, my wife. This was after I had a particularly bad day:

"Come on home, Baybee. I'm waiting"

Who would not want to come home to that?

FROM: Nick trying to horrify me by sending me this text from his Scout stay at SeaBase in Florida:.

"Not even joking - I just touched a shark. It was freaking amazing :-)"

FROM: Melissa, who is far from it:

"I'm shy."

FROM: Gina, one of my BFFs.

"Not a good day. Drinking limoncello and watching Billy the Exterminator."

FROM: Melissa when she started her new math class with a hot teacher.

"The teacher is not ugly :)"

FROM: Brittany, my baby sister.

"I love u sis....You are who you are and you really are amazing. I am honored to be your sister. LMAO. Got me feeling emotional... I'm sorry I don't say it enough. xo :)"

Every word is true...

FROM: Graham, a wonderful guy that I have had the joy to see grow from a cool teenager into a cooler gay man.

"I just read your interview with the pastor from Atlanta (Jim Swilley), Brought me to tears. What a story!"

What he doesn't know is that HE inspires ME!

FROM: My good pal, Crushie, at the moment that I was going in for a scholarship interview:

"TOWANDA"

-Quite inspirational!

More to come....

Signs

2011-02-24T18:03:00.000-05:00

These are the good folks from an unnamed church full of media whores. They show up with these lovely signs letting everyone know about all of the things that God hates. I was doing a sociology project on nagative images using things like this when I ran across this GEM:

Ah, Hahahahaha! Methinks that certain pastor is a closet case...

One Badass Roach

2011-01-14T22:09:00.002-05:00

Tonight, I was laying in my bed with my daughter and my girl, Melissa. We were just talking and laughing and minding our own business when I looked up at the ceiling and saw absolute horror: "OMG! Look!" I exclaimed. Melissa saw it and asked, "What is that!?! A Black Manta?" which sent Lindsey & I into giggle fits. Lindsey said, "What is a Black Manta?" A cross between a black mamba and praying mantis? Or a black widow & manta ray? "Well, whatever he is, he's got balls to just come out in broad daylight up on the ceiling like that and just sit there staring at us." said Melissa.

Concerned for my safety, I did what any mom with a son would do. "NICK!" I yelled. "There's a bug in here. Come get it!" No, he didn't rush in to rescue the ladies. He yelled back "Why?"

Why??? Because there is a giant, bad ass roach on my ceiling smoking a cigarette and looking like he wants to roll me! "Because you have testicles and that's what people with testicles do. Come get him!"

He certainly took his time making his way down the hall to us. He looked at the roach and went into the bathroom to get tissue. While he was in there taking his sweet-ass time, the roach did the unthinkable. He LEAPT like an Olympian track star from the ceiling, doing double gainers all the way down.

My life flashed before my eyes and I let out a shriek that no self-respecting, soft-butch lesbian should ever let out. Apparently I was the only one who saw it as my two bedfellows appeared totally bewildered at my horror - especially my daughter, who I shamelessly used as a shield by grabbing her and thrusting her towards where I thought the roach landed. "He jumped!!!" I yelled. They all looked up at the empty ceiling and Nick finally emerged from the bathroom. He and Melissa looked on the bed and around it with no sign of the Black Mantis anywhere.

As I began to get teased for my scream, we started laughing about the GUTS of that roach to appear in the open like that and just hang out, waiting to be killed and then leap across the room and scamper off. Just knowing he was still nearby was un-nerving.

My daughter offered me this comfort: "Mom, it was likely a roach gang initiation. They made him come out in the light, hang out on the ceiling and then try to leap on us. If he makes it back alive, he's in. I bet right now, they're high-fiving him and giving him a tiny bandana with their colors."

Here is how I imagine him now:

Shannon Stock: Down

2011-01-12T21:12:00.000-05:00

Today, Melissa was snuggling next to me on our bed. Since we are snowed in, we've both been trying to get ahead in our classes. I was working on Satan's Science (a.k.a. math) and my lovely wife was working on something computery a few inches away from me.

I finished my assignment and opened my inbox to check my e-mail. I mentioned to Melissa that my sister had left a note for me on Facebook to call her. She said, "Well, give her a call right now and see if everything is okay." I glanced at my phone and then at my inbox. I had 23 messages. "Okay, I'll call her in a second. I need to get my inbox down to 20 messages before I can call her." She stared at me. "I like to have my inbox end in a 5 or a 0. Like 5, 10, 15, 20...".

She stared at me.

"What? It helps me keep my inbox cleared out because I have motivation to delete things instead of letting them stack up. Each time I open my mail, I can't close it unless I get rid of enough to make it end in a 5 or a 0."

"Why did you just tell me that?" she asked, laughing. I could tell that I had revealed something about myself that may have lowered my stock in her mind. Hopefully, she'll reflect further on it and decide it's adorably cute. Hopefully...

Math Athiest

2011-01-11T10:05:00.000-05:00

I knew it would have to happen eventually. I knew that I'd have to take a math class before I could get my degree. It doesn't make it any easier, though. I've been snowed in for the last 2 days and trying to use my time to get ahead on my (truckload of) homework. That got me reflecting.

When I was 15, I used to sit in my math class and think "I'll never need to know this. Why am I being tortured this way?" Now, I'm 41 and I am having to take a remedial math class to try to refresh me on the things that I never learned the first time around. Things like -19 - (-9/12) + 5 - (-44) = ___. Although I can solve this (thank you for explaining it to me, Melissa), it's stupid. I was right... I've never needed to know how to solve a problem like that in the 26 years between my 15 year old self and now. Why am I being tortured this way?

I found a Calvin & Hobbes cartoon that adequately sums up my feelings on the topic:

Texts From Lindsey

2011-01-02T18:57:00.000-05:00

"Texts From Lindsey" is a regular column featuring texts from my 16 year old daughter. Please enjoy them as much as I do:
.
Lindsey & I are both in love with our sweet little Schnoodle dog named Captain Jack Sparrow. We call him "Jack" for short. Lindsey sent this text about him to me and it put a smile on my face for the rest of the week:
.
"OMG! I just saw the cutest thing EVER. Jack was chasing a BUTTERFLY!"
.
I was on my way to pick Lindsey up from her SAT prep exam. To prepare her, I texted her that I was 5 minutes away. Her reply?:
.
"You aren't supposed to text while driving, Mom."
.
Not a fan of any type of social gathering, Lindsey allowed her friends to talk her into going to the Homecoming dance. From the dance, she sent this series of texts:
.
":-( I think I'm leaving early. For the third year in a row. Can you come get me?"
.
I asked her where her dad was as he lives closer to her school. Her reply:
.
"He's still at dinner. He didn't heed my distress call :-( Shows what being raised in captivity can do to a creature..."
.
This random text from a Monday morning:
.
":-( I hate school...."
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Then this uplifting random text:
.
"...I got a nap : D"
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And finally, the question that I will never have an answer for:
.
"Mommy, why are boys stupid?"

2010 in Review

2010-12-31T17:18:00.001-05:00

Today, I spoke to a friend of mine since childhood. She has had a lot of difficulties in life but she told me that 2010 was the *worst* year of her life and she was glad to put it behind her. Later, I read another blogger who was writing that 2010 was a bad year for her. This made me reflect on the year and I just wanted to tell 2010 that I didn't mind you one bit!

First of all, I took 4 quarters in college and got straight A's. My perfect academic record has made my college sit up and take notice. As a result, I got nominated for several scholarships. That doesn't suck! I was also nominated by 2 professors on 2 different campus locations to interview for an internship at a large media outlet (TV/radio) here in Atlanta. I interviewed for and GOT that internship and I start working there next week.

In 2010, I went on an amazing honeymoon with my beautiful wife and my wonderful parents. We enjoyed 10 days in Italy and made memories that will last a lifetime. This trip was a gift from a very dear and generous friend of ours, Joan. She is loving and cool and was there for both Melissa and I when we were coming out. We are so grateful to have her in our lives.

My son received his Eagle Scout rank in 2010 and he is in the process of applying to colleges. His SAT scores have qualified him for entrance to some of the best schools in the nation and I really look forward to seeing who will be offering him a scholarship.

My daughter is her Mommy's girl. She is becoming so much like me, I am amazed. Of course, she is one of my favorite people on the planet. She always has me laughing. She is also one of the most gifted writers I've ever read and I know she will be blessing people with her work in the years to come.

I began freelancing for The Georgia Voice, a bi-weekly GLBT magazine here in Atlanta. I have written over a dozen pieces for them. I also had my first cover story - an interview with country singer Chely Wright. I also got an amazing feature story with Bishop Jim Swilley. Both of these articles were picked up and reprinted by The Washington Blade. I'm a published writer - a dream I always had but was never able to persue. A published writer who has never even taken a college English class up to this point. Yes, 2010. Thanks.

I have the most amazing, positive friends ever! They are always so full of support and encouragement and have been so generous towards me with their time, talents and treasures. Kelly gives us free hair cuts while always offering a listening ear. Gina hired me to help her clean and organize her house every other week. This has enabled me to afford some extra things that, as a college student, I wouldn't have otherwise been able to buy. There are many others, too. Each one inspires me in their own way to be a better person and I wouldn't trade them for anything!

2010 was also the year where Melissa's dad finally agreed to be around me. He's never been a big fan of his daughter being a lesbian and he really didn't take too kindly to her moving from Michigan to Georgia to be with me. As a result, he didn't want to be around me. I'm not sure what changed his mind but we spent a few days over the summer and got along rather well. This was a big deal because he changed for the positive and that made everyone's lives better.

I got back in touch with a beloved friend of mine in 2010. In my previous marriage, I had a sister-in-law who was very dear to me. We absolutely loved spending time together and were always there to comfort each other at the family gatherings. When I left my ex, he made it clear that I was not to contact his family because they all "hated me". I lost touch with her and it was sad. This year, I found out that she left her husband shortly after I left mine. I looked her up and found her and we are back in touch the way family should be. Not only that, but I also found out that many of my ex's family members didn't hate me at all and we stay in touch. I still love them - divorce doesn't change that. It's nice to have them back in my life.

I've put a lot behind me. I see the destructiveness of bitterness and how it makes people mentally ill. I refuse to allow the people who screwed me over to keep screwing me over in my mind because I am allowing myself to dwell on it. After all, I am SO HAPPY! Why should I care if my journey was made more painful or that I was kicked when I was down? I MADE IT! I am where I always dreamed I wanted to be. And like my late, sorely missed Grandma used to say, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

Looking ahead: I plan to graduate with an Associates this summer and then transfer to a 4 year to get my Bachelor degree. I plan to work this internship to a degree that this media outlet will have no choice but to hire me. I plan to start adding to my retirement IRA again and help support my wife while she goes to college. We are going to KICK ASS in 2011. As much as I am looking forward to continuing to climb my ladder of success in 2011, I will always look back on 2010 with fondness and be grateful to the people in my life who have contributed to my happiness and success.

Happy New Year, everyone. I wish you as much as joy, health, love and happiness as I have.

My Daughter: Can Prison Be Far Away?

2010-12-13T16:38:00.002-05:00

I wrote last week about my 16 year old daughter getting in trouble at school for not tucking her shirt in. Believe me, I have hardly slept a wink since then worrying about where her life is heading and where I went wrong as a mother. As you can imagine, I nearly became despondant today when I got another "Confidential Behavioral Notice" in my e-mail. Here is what it said:

This email is to inform you of a behavior event that has been recorded for your child (Lindsey). The details of the event are listed below:

Date of Event: 12/13/2010

Reported By: (Same idiotic teacher as last week)

Event: Dress code violation

Description: No belt

Consequence 1: (Dec 13 2010) < Demerit A >

Demerits: 1

If you have any questions regarding this matter please contact the school.
---------------------------------------------------

The only questions that I have are where did I go wrong as a mother and can prison be in her near future? I need to go now and plan a fashion intervention for her. I also need to alert Santa not to bother stopping by our house this year. If I can't get this kid turned around, this is the only uniform she is going to be worrying about wearing:

Lessons Learned From Mr. Freund

2010-12-08T07:00:00.027-05:00

When I started college at 40 a little over a year ago, I began a journey that I should have taken at 18. It isn’t important why I delayed my education, just that I went ahead and began it. I chose Marketing as my major since I am interested in it and Journalism wasn’t offered at a 2 year college where I had to begin due to my past horrid grades.

Mr. Freund was the first teacher of my first class, Intro to Marketing. I have had him for at least 1 class each quarter since I began, but often having him for 2 classes at a time. Last night was the last class that I will ever have with him. He is moving out of state and I am moving out of my marketing classes and into my core classes now. This all has me feeling sentimental and pondering the things that I have learned from someone who I now consider a friend and a mentor. So here they are, in no particular order:

1. Do your best work ALL OF THE TIME. It has not been easy to start college after a 22 year break but I wanted to set an example for my teenagers. I also wanted to show a 4 year college that I am not the same student that I was at 18. I really paid attention to everything that Mr. Freund said and wanted to do a good job for him because he was giving me his best in the classroom. As a result, I have taken 17 classes thus far and have received A’s in every damn one of them.

2. Don’t put up with bullshit, but extend grace when you can. At the beginning of each class when students are just starting their new quarters, Mr. Freund gives his “Not my problem” speech. I always thought him very wise to let the students know up front that he expects them to take personal responsibility for turning their work in. If they wait until the last minute and then have difficulties with the computer, it’s too damn bad. If you don’t establish your standards in the beginning, there will always be a class of people (excuse-makers) who will give you elaborate stories of why they were not able to complete their work. This speech is for them. However, I have seen him truly listen to people who have valid problems and he doesn’t cling rigidly to his “not my problem” mantra when he knows that there is a valid reason. I love him for telling people that excuses will not work, but I love him more for having the ability to see when he needs to bend those rules and work with someone.

3. You don’t have to raise your voice to make your point. Okay, I already knew this from my experience as a mom. But Mr. Freund has shown me that it still works with adults. He is a slow talker and he keeps his voice at a normal level. When people are acting up in class (which is rare), he just needs to give them a look and they are suddenly filled with shame for disrupting him. (Or they should be). I’ve never heard him raise his voice because his demeanor commands respect.

4. Go out of your way to help when you can. Mr. Freund has extended one favor after another to me each and every time I have asked. Whether it is writing a letter of recommendation for a scholarship or sending me a file that I lost on my flash drive, he is quick to help with a smile. What does he get in return? Nothing but my sincere and heartfelt appreciation.

5. If you want to advance in a company, go where they want to send you. I don’t know if I will ever need this advice or not, but it makes me realize that flexibility is something that an employer values. For that matter, it is something that everyone values. It doesn’t always have to be my way or the highway. I can yield my will to others and consider their needs and interests ahead of my own.

6. Don’t let a physical handicap keep you from living your best life. I have seen Mr. Freund struggle to write on the white board because he has some pretty bad tremors. From what ailment? I really don’t know. But I do know that whatever it is, he has found a way to work around it and it isn’t even an issue for him. He no longer writes on the white board but his Power Point presentations ROCK! Whatever you think is going to keep you from your goal, you can find a way to get there despite your circumstances as long as you have the will to be successful.

7. Nothing ventured, nothing ventured. Mr. Freund has always encouraged his students to be brave about trying to do things and not let fear paralyze you and keep you from trying to take action to make your dreams come true. So many people are too scared to lose that they just stay content working for someone else on their terms. Failure isn't anything but a lesson to learn so that it brings your next attempt one step closer to success. I am no longer full of self-doubt because I can see all along that he has been right. Whenever I step out and start to do something out of my comfort zone, I end up being successful. At the same time, new and unexpected opportunities end up in front of me. Fear isn't anything for me to even consider now. I can only succeed.

I think about the teachers that I could have been learning under and I am so thankful and appreciative that I got Mr. Freund - someone that genuinely wants to impart wisdom and knowledge and invests himself in those who want to be invested in. Words can’t say how much I’m going to miss him but I can promise you one thing: as I go forward with my education, in my career and in my life, I am going to make him proud.

Texts From Lindsey

2010-12-07T09:00:00.001-05:00

A new batch of text messages that I received from my teenager, Lindsey:

We were talking about the sexy Lisa Edelstein who plays Dr. Lisa Cuddy on HOUSE. Apparently, I misspelled her name because Lindsey sent this text:

"It's Cuddy. With 2 d's. And if you try to make a pervy joke out of that, I will climb through the phone and eat you."

A random one, sent from the middle of a school day:

"Did the US ever lose a war?"

She knows that I would literally kidnap a baby if I thought I could get away with it. I just LOVE babies. Whenever she gets to hold one, I get a text. This one came from her when she was visiting her uncle and his new baby girl:

"I GOT A BAAAAAAAAABY:-P"

I replied, "I'm eating chocolate." Take that, you little brat! She replied:

"Baby trumps chocolate."

(Damn her! She's right!)

When Melissa & I went to Italy, we bought her a nice Italian leather bracelet. She sent this text from school:

"Italian bracelet = 21 jealous classmates (with some type of winky emoticon that I can't seem to reproduce on my keyboard.)

My Daughter: Trouble at School

2010-12-06T17:23:00.001-05:00

Every mom dreads the day that they get a note sent home with their child to report a problem. Since I taught my kids at home almost all of their lives, I never had to experience that issue. However, my children wanted the "high school experience" and their dad enrolled them in a private Christian school.

It has been an adjustment for me to not have say in everything that they learn and I have missed reading with them and discussing things that we learn together. However, this has been a good experience for them because it is preparing them for college and they can know the joys of quirky teachers, rules and severe homework.

Today, I got an e-mail that had the subject line "Confidential Behavioral Notice for Lindsey _______".

Shit.

What did she do? She can be a smart ass and she is occasionally unprepared for class. Just looking at it among all of the other things in my inbox, I had to read it before anything else. After all, it was "confidential" and it involved some type of bad behavior. I opened it and read it with horror:

This email is to inform you of a behavior event that has been recorded for your child (Lindsey). The details of the event are listed below:

Date of Event: 12/06/2010

Reported By: (Name of teacher was here but to protect her privacy, I am removing it)

Event: Dress code violation

Description: Shirt untucked

Consequence 1: (Dec 6 2010) < Demerit A >

Demerits: 0.3

.

I'm sure you can all just imagine how concerned I am about my little rebel, not to mention the sheer embarrassment of having a child that doesn't tuck her shirt in. (NOT). I seriously cannot believe someone actually took the time to write this up and clutter my inbox with it. Send me an e-mail if she gets caught smoking or fails an assignment, but I think a teacher should be able to handle an untucked shirt without involving a parent. I hope the kids are enjoying their experience...I know I am!

2011 Miss TSA Calendar (Sneak Peek)

2010-12-05T10:28:00.000-05:00

That's right! Here are just a few of the lovely ladies of the 2011 Miss TSA Calendar. Get yours today!

Texts from Lindsey

2010-11-28T09:06:00.000-05:00

This is Lindsey, my hilarious, snarky teenage daughter. We communicate on a daily basis. My preference is to have an actual conversation, where I can hear her voice or look at the expressions on her face. Her preference is via text messages. where she can say what she wants and ignore my replies. Over the last year, I have been "locking" some of her funny texts in my phone to save. However, those messages now make up roughly 75% of all of the messages in my phone. I need to make room for new messages so I have to start deleting them. What to do?
.
I asked Lindsey if I could start publishing them here on my blog. That way, I can still have a place to go look at them and laugh but they won't be filling up my phone. Also, God forbid that I should lose my phone somewhere (it's been known to happen) and I lose all of the funny messages. So without further ado, here is the first installment of a new series that I won't be calling "Shit my Daughter Says", but rather "Texts from Lindsey". Since they all have her number on the screen, I shall just be typing what the message says instead of screenshotting my phone. Enjoy!
.
Reflecting on a conversation that we had about my first wedding and how my mom planned everything and all I asked for was watermelon. My mom, an elitist, balked about watermelon not being a "classy" food. To make me laugh, Lindsey sent this:
Text #1: "How do you make watermelon classy?"
.
When I gave her brother a chocolate but she was in another room, she texted me:
Text #2: "Why does only Nick (her brother) get chocolate?"
.
Text #3: "i need someone to text... will you text me?"
.
Text #4: "PING PONG wubbawubbawubbyubba WAHHHHHHHHHHH. That was my cute text for the day."
.
From a wedding that she didn't want to go to but she was forced by her dad to attend, she texted me:
Text #5: "...help me...im drowning in awkwardness..."
.
I asked her if there was an actual thing that I could do to help her. She replied with:
Text #6: "no. I just wanted to complain. thnx."
.
Text #7: (from school) "...eww im dissecting a frog. its gross"
.
Text #8: (sending me a news headline) " 'BADASS GRANDMA SLAPS FOULMOUTH GRANDDAUGHTER' <---full of winningness"
.
Text #9: "What I am is good enough, if I could only be it openly. - Carl R. Rogers"
.
When I was in Target and she wanted to stay in the car to read, she texted me this request for me to purchase a bag of rainbow Goldfish Crackers:
Text #10: "bring me gay fish plz :)"
.
This happy news:
Text #11: "i got into honors english :)"
.
and the last one for today, this gem:
Text #12: "So I was thinking of starting a cult..."

A REAL Love Story

2010-11-12T12:41:00.002-05:00

A few weeks ago, I was surfing Facebook and saw that someone had posted a video about the Bishop of a local mega-church who came out of the closet to his congregation. Thinking that it was my former pastor, I clicked on it and watched Bishop Jim Swilley gently and with great care and love explain to his congregation how he came to the place where he knew it was time to share his truth - that God had created him as a gay man.

As I watched it, I cried. I could feel his pain and know how difficult it can be to have lived a life where you have surrounded yourself with fundamental evangelicals and know that by just giving them new information about you will cost you the love of those people. It will cause them to shift their way of thinking about you from a good, loving friend to a disgusting, insane pervert. And you didn't even do anything! You just told them that you have always been this way.

I wanted to talk to this man. I needed to talk to this man!

I sent the editor of a local GLBT magazine that I freelance for an e-mail asking her if I could do a story on him. She gave me the green light and after a day of trying to get in touch with him, I got him to agree to the interview, as well as let me speak to his ex-wife and their son who is a youth pastor.

I've done a lot if interviews. I have done them for online and print publications and I usually always get something out of them. I was completely unprepared to have my wagons loaded by this family. With each of the 3 conversations that I had, tears flowed as I listened to them share about this painful journey.

The most bitter pill to swallow in my own coming out experience was the loss of friendship with my ex. Initially, he was loving, warm and accepting. He knew how I must have suffered and was able to offer me comfort and the assurance of our continued friendship. However, when he met with the leadership of our church, he came home that day a different man. A man who was instructed that shunning me would be the best route to take. He was instructed to move from a place of support to an adversarial position. The church "supported" him by announcing my sin in a public worship service to clear his name. As a result of their "support" of him, he has massive legal debt, no friendship with me or my parents, and more responsibility that he can handle. The church got what they wanted from him and he is left to pick up the pieces of a life that didn't even need to be shattered. What a destructive force!

THIS IS THE INTERVIEW that I did and I hope you will read it. This couple is how I wanted to be with my ex... how it could have been if he were able to stay in a loving place and not see things from the viewpoint of how is this all going to affect him, but rather how this must have taken a toll on me and how hard I tried for 18 years to change. I can't fault him for his reaction, but I can wish that his response would have been more like the wife in this story. I hope that you will click on the link and read this amazing, touching story of Jim & Debye Swilley - a love story in the truest sense of the word.

Gorgeous Doesn't Begin to Cover It

2010-11-04T08:07:00.000-04:00

This is my beloved son, Nick. He is as beautiful on the outside as he is on the inside.

No mother has ever loved her son as much as I love mine.

How I Almost Got Arrested

2010-10-25T20:24:00.000-04:00

Some background from the Georgia Encyclopedia:

In 1987 racial tensions again erupted in Forsyth County. In January a small march in Cumming to commemorate Martin Luther King Jr.’s birthday met with resistance from local members of the Ku Klux Klan, who threw stones and glass bottles at the demonstrators. The event received national attention, and on January 24, 20,000 marchers from around the country converged on Forsyth County. Led by numerous civil rights leaders, including Hosea Williams, the marchers encountered 1,000 to 2,000 counter-demonstrators, but the presence of large numbers of police and National Guard troops most likely kept the event from turning violent. The event was one of the largest civil rights demonstrations since the 1960s…

So I was taking my son to his football game in Forsyth County (about an hour away) on Saturday night. He had the best game of his life and we really enjoyed seeing him play.

Anyway, we left the game to go meet one of Nick's friends and her parents for dinner. We were in Melissa's car but I always drive it at night because she can't see her hand in front of her face when it gets dark. I had gotten a few miles down the road when I saw blue lights come on behind me. I knew that I wasn't speeding.

I pulled over and the officer came to my window to tell me that the light that was supposed to illuminate my license plate was out. The same light that I got pulled over for several weeks earlier. The same light that Melissa told me that she would fix with the help of our 14 year old.

He asked me for my license.

Shit.

2 days earlier, I had a big test in my advertising class and I packed my book bag with my books, notebooks and laptop. I didn't have any room for my wallet so I just put my license and a credit card in a zippered compartment. When I got back home, I failed to transfer my things back into my wallet.

"I left my license at home."

He said he could look it up with my name and date of birth. I gave him that info and he left. He returned and asked me if I knew that my license had expired.

"No. I just got it last year. It is not expired." He took additional info and left to re-try.

When he came back, he asked me to step out of the car so that I could face the camera on the dash of his car. I thought that he might have some kind of facial recognition software that could look me up. I forgot I was in Redneckersonville, USA. No sooner had I faced his cruiser than he slapped the handcuffs on me and held me by my arm.

At this point, a butchy female cop, who I will call "CLOSET CASE IN DENIAL", came over to harass me.

"Maam, do you have a sister?"

"Yes."

"Is this her car?"

"No. It's her car." (I pointed to Melissa in the passenger seat)

"Who is that?"

"She's my wife."

"What?"

"She's my wife."

"Your WIFE?"

"Yes. My wife."

(she is laughing this part:) "Did you have some kind of sex change operation or something?"

(At this point, I would like to show you a photo of myself and ask you if anyone here has any doubt that I am, in fact, a natural-born woman):

That butchy ladycop was a hundred times the man I am. In fact, I would have been surprised if she wasn't wearing mens boxer-briefs under her uniform.

"No. I did not have a sex change operation. I am a lesbian and we were married in a church."

At this point, the nice cop came over and he assured me that he didn't have any problem with my being gay while C.C.I.D. also nodded in agreement and then tried to justify her little joke with a "you just never know these days. Maybe that was the problem with the name mix up."

Right. So if I had a sex change operation, I am sure I would keep my first name and just change my last name to match my new gender identity, right?

Good cop asked me a few more questions about addresses that I lived at and returned to his patrol car and leaving me with the angry version of Peppermint Patty.

Not content to just be helpful, she starts in: "So we're going to be taking you to jail. IF you can make bail, you will be assigned a court date. At that time, you can take it up with the judge as to whether or not you're lying about having a current drivers license."

She then went over to tell Melissa that she was taking me to jail and wanted to know if Melissa had been drinking and could she drive the vehicle. Meanwhile, nice cop returned and asked me about my last name. It was showing up with my maiden and married names run together as one name. I explained that on November 4th of last year, I got my license updated by removing my ex's last name from mine.

Melissa & my son called my 16 year old at home and had her read the numbers off my license in the pocket of my book bag. Closet Case wrote it on her hand (classy) and they solved the mystery.

Apparently, when I went to have my license changed, they dropped my maiden name and kept my married name instead of the other way around. My license read the other way, but in their system, it was wrong.

Closet Case was sure sad that she didn't get to take me in. I'm sure she would have enjoyed spending more time with me. Had I actually been arrested, I would have spent my time in jail starting a gang. As it was, I rushed off to apologize to my son's friends for delaying dinner because I was handcuffed for an hour.

The next day, Melissa replaced the bulb and I put my ID back in my wallet. My son thought it was cool to see his mom get handcuffed and my daughter got a special thanks for helping to keep her mom out of jail.

Closet Case returned to her empty trailer to feed her 9 cats and watch Cagney & Lacey reruns.

My Parents Rock Atlanta Pride 2010

2010-10-13T12:49:00.000-04:00

I am proud of my parents who are not only supportive of me, but they also advocate for me. I wish they had a "Cool Parent Pride" parade because I would be the Grand Marshall.